Thursday, February 28, 2013

The Biggest Loser: Season 14, Episode 9 Facing Our Fears

Welcome to The Biggest Loser Ranch!  It's episode 9 on Season 14.  This week's them: Facing our Fears.

The very first thing Allison says after Francelina goes home is that it is not only 1 person leaving the Ranch tonight. WHA?  One person will be leaving the ranch for a week.  And that person will be determined in a challenge right now.

Everyone has a fear of leaving the Ranch. The comfort of the trainers, time, equipment, food, well it's just too good. How will they be able to cope when they leave?


Everyone has a life size picture. It's up to their friends to keep them on the Ranch. They will need to take their color coded cinder blocks and carry them across the field.  They are to put them in front of who they want to keep on the Ranch. Once their picture is covered they are safe. And they can't put their blocks on themselves.

Gina immediately says that she knows it going to be her.  She is the current Biggest Loser and was the "biggest bitch" last week.

Oh and whoever stacks the most of their blocks gets a one lb advantage on the scale.

Danni and Joe are always competing with each other. They push each other. Early on Danni falls. It's hard to tell how long she is down, but she gets up and it doesn't look like it slowed her down.

Jackson starts asking people not to put blocks in front of him. He wants to do it. He wants to leave the Ranch. He wants to see how he does off of the Ranch.

It comes down to him and Gina. It's very close, but Jackson is the last to have his picture covered. Gina is very grateful and he tells her "Just be good this week."  She needs this week to make things better with herself and with the other contestants.

So Danni used 19 of her bricks, but Joe used 20. She's disappointed. She had a big week last week and needs that one lb. If she hadn't fallen, she might have gotten it.

Jackson sees this week as a good test run. But, the fun doesn't end there. He has to pick one other person to go with him. You could tell he didn't want to have to do that. 

Follow Up

We get to see how Francelina looks. Wow that was quick. She just left!  When she came to the Ranch she weighed 267 lbs.  She has now lost close to 100 lbs. And she looks Smokin Hot!  She is rockin a red wrap dress. While she is looking at the pictures the photographer took of her she says that before she only ever took pictures of her face. "I'm okay being in front of the camera now."  Good for her! She looks great!

Back to the Challenge

Jeff steps up and volunteers to go with Jackson. He says that Jackson was a good motivator when the trainers were gone.

They dub their week the: Mancation.

*Side note, I sort of knew this was going to happen because I follow Jackson on Instagram and he posted a bunch of photos from the "mancation" on Tuesday haha


They weren't kidding when they said that they were leaving that day. The next thing we know Jackson and Jeff are at the house. Jackson says that "it's a good opportunity to show america that we can do it."

There is no food in the house. They do have some workout equipment and bicycles.

Checking in with the Kids


Dolvett asks Lindsay what she's afraid of. She says that she has a fear of Diabetes.  She has been diagnosed as Pre-diabetic.

Dolvett asks her what diabetes means. She says that it's when the body doesn't handle insulin.  He tells her that he wants her to see what it's like to live with Diabetes. He's going to introduce her to someone with Diabetes.


Bob starts by talking with Biingo's mom. Biingo's biggest fear is Vegetables (Bob couldn't believe it either). When he was younger, he thought broccoli was made in a factory. Bob tells Biingo's mom that he's going to give her some recipes to blend vegetables in with Biingo's food.


Jillian asks Sunny what her biggest fear is. Break out the tissues, because this is where my waterworks turned on. Her biggest fear is losing her mom to obesity. She's afraid of her mom dying. "The fact that she's not getting healthy affects me getting healthy."


Jackson and Jeff go to the grocery store. They do very well. They even get spaghetti squash. WOO WOO!

When they are back at the house they are talking and Jeff says that back home there were days when he literally tried not to leave his bed. There was a show that had 9 seasons. He watched all 9 seasons in 4.5 days.

They start talking about fears and Jeff says that his biggest fear is Failure.

Time for them to workout. They go for a hike.


Biingo's mom purees the vegetables and puts them in a ground turkey meatloaf.  His mom says that she feels responsible because she didn't make him eat them. She failed him.

He eats the meal and seems fine. They ask how it was. Then tell him there were vegetables in it. He makes a face, but agrees that if they can hide them.

Facing Fears

Jillian walks with Gina. Gina's fear is small spaces. Surprise! Jillian has a coffin for her because "you're killing yourself". While she's in the coffin Gina keeps saying to herself "I have a second chance."  She is in there for 20 minutes. When she gets out she says that the show has given her strength.


Lindsay goes to the Guidance Counselor's office. She is diabetic. She tells Lindsay that she's right to be afraid. Lindsay asked her how she felt when she found out that she was diabetic. "I was pissed. I liked to eat. I liked to cook." She pulls out her needle kit and shows Lindsay what it's like to give herself a shot.

Lindsay is worried. "What if I get it and can't live life like a normal kid?"

The Counselor tells her that she can do it. She just needs to cut out the junk and sugary drinks.  Lindsay agrees to eat healthier and in moderation.


It's time for a challenge. A fear of heights challenge. We see platforms hanging over the top of the building and hear Jackson yelling "Noooooooooo. Seven different kinds of No!"

They will be harnessed and standing 7 stories off of the ground. They will also be holding 40% of their body weight.  The winner gets...wait for it....Immunity!

Jeff struggles. He is the heaviest and his 40% is still high. He is the first one to fall.

After 5 minutes Jackson and Joe are both straining. Jackson falls. Then Alex. Then Joe.

At 11 minutes, it's down to Danni and Gina. Danni is straining on her tip toes. At 18 minutes Gina is shaking. She's chanting to herself "Pain is temporary. Winning is forever."

After 20 minutes, Danni tries to make an adjustment. She slips and is only holding on with one hand. It doesn't last long.

Gina wins immunity.


Sunny sits and talks to her mom. She tells her that she starts the fad diets and then puts the weight back on. She's scared that if she continues she'll get sick. "I want you to do the things that you can't."  Her mom doesn't really warm to this. She gets a little defensive. "You don't make me sad, it makes me angry. I know I can't do these things." Sunny tells her that she's afraid she's going to die. Her mom says that it's hard for a mother to hear.  The mother is supposed to console the daughter, not cause her fear. She tells her that they are going to do this together.


Product endorsement

Jillian brings Danni several boxes of Uber bars. They are Lara bars and are gluten free. Yeah, I want to try them.  Good marketing kids.

Facing Fears

Danni's fear is singing in public. She has a beautiful voice, but she was afraid of being seen. So Jillian takes her to a lounge to sing. She sings the National Anthem. She does really well. "I always thought they would see the fat girl, not me."

Joe and Bob head out to the water. Joe has a fear of Sharks. SHARK WEEK!  Bob wants him to swim 500 yards in open water.  As he's swimming Bob is yelling what a great workout this is. He tells Joe to let go. "Don't always try to control everything."

Back on the Ranch

Gina apologizes to Alex for behavior the last week. Alex says it's okay. She knows Gina. That wasn't her.

Mancation Last Chance Workout

Jackson and Jeff Push the trashcans and run up the street. Then they do 20 jumping jacks and 10 squats. Then they push the trashcans back and repeat. Jackson says that the key is cardio.

Challenge America

Brita gave workout equipment and water bottles to Sunny's School. They stress drinking 8 oz of water 8 times a day.

Weigh In

It's tank top week!  The ladies are no longer wearing sports bras at weigh in and the men are now wearing shirts. YEAH!

*Gina started at 180 lbs and now weighs 173 lbs for a total of 7 lbs.
  -"I got buried in a coffin and came out a different person. I was reborn."
  -3.89% and immunity
*Jackson started at 261 lbs and now weighs 250 lbs for a total of 11 lbs.
  -Dolvett "The whole point of training you is to teach you so that you can do it."
*Jeff started at 308 lbs and now weighs 295 lbs for a total of 13 lbs.
   -the last time he was under 300 lbs was when he was 16.
*Joe is 9 lbs from losing 100 lbs on the Ranch
  -Started at 273 lbs and now weighs 261 lbs for a total of 12 lbs plus the 1 lb advantage.
*Alex needs more than 8 lbs.
   -Started at 195 lbs and now weighs 187 lbs for a total of 8 lbs.
   -"It's still not good enough."  Bob tells her "You doubled your average!"
*Danni needs more than 8 lbs.
   -Started at 194 lbs and now weighs 184 lbs for a total of 10 lbs.
   -"I don't need a safety net."

Danni is the biggest loser for the week, but Gina is still the Biggest Loser for the season.

Elimination is between Alex and Jackson. In the event of a tie Alex will go home because she had the lower percentage.


Joe: Alex
Danni: Alex

Alex is going home.

Allison tells the remaining contestants that they have made it to Makeover Week...and they will all be going home to debut their makeovers.

Follow Up

Alex started on the Ranch at 240 lbs and now weighs 170 lbs. She has lost 70 lbs. She works out 6 days a week. Sometimes for 4 hours a day.
Have a Blessed Night my friends.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

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Random Wednesday on a Thursday!

Hey there Bleepies!

Sorry that I missed Random Wednesday yesterday.  It was an unexpectedly busy day and then after work I had a Church dinner/discussion.  I didn't get home until much later than usual and I just did not have it in me to log on to the computer. My brain needed a rest.

So yesterday was a little crazy because my day started very stiff and sore. I had a really really good run the night before. I got the water massage after instead of my usual stretching. That was not enough. I needed to stretch in the morning. I was just about to text Ms. Kerri that I would be a little late when she texted me that she was sick and unable to work. DOH!  No time to stretch. I must hustle out the door.

My day was thrown off and I really wasn't paying attention. It was 10am before I forced myself to go to my first bathroom break. That is WAY off schedule for me. I should be on my 2nd one by then at least!

I forgot to mention in my Ode To Cheese post the other day: Mozzarella Sticks! Seriously, if there was an eating contest for them, I am 100% sure I would win. My brain and my body do not agree on this at all. I want more!  I know how bad I will feel, but my body does not care. It want's more!


Good news! There is another Gym Crush. Originally I had pegged this one guy as a crush, but it didn't stick so he's out. haha. I don't know what to nickname this one.  I'll just call him Gym Crush Babe. I like that he's equal with his weights and cardio. That's a great combo for me.

The other night he made the approach while I was on a water break from my long distance run and I didn't really process it until I was turning to head back to the treadmill. DOH. I hope that doesn't change his interest. I just can't mess with training days.  Just over two weeks to go!


So even though I was really stiff and sore yesterday, there was one thing that kept me from working from home. We had a planned lunch out: California Pizza Kitchen!  I have been drooling over this for a week. Now, let me say ahead of time, that 20% of our bill was going to charity.

I had my eye on this Artichoke and Spinach pizza with chicken. My eyes were drawn to the picture. My mouth salivated at the description. My head is screaming: NO, get something with less calories!  But, as we sat there nothing else made my heart skip a beat like this did. The price made me hesitate, but I realized that if I only ate half and saved the other half for lunch today then it wouldn't be a bad price for two meals.

I got it.

OMG! So yummy. And I needn't worry. I only ate half. I considered putting the other half in the fridge at work, but I didn't trust that someone wouldn't see the box and steal it. So I immediately put it in my car...DOH!  My car has smelled like spinach and artichoke pizza for a day now.


So um when I was down at Dad's this weekend they sent me home with some caramel corn. We HEART Fishers popcorn. If you bring back your plastic containers you get a we have several in each size. I didn't even fill my small one half way so I didn't have That much...but um...I finished it off between Sunday night and Monday after book club. ARGH.


Last night's dinner at church was soup. It was tasty and I had a bowl of each. It was yummy and I was happy. This morning when I got in my car to head to work it was like my belly was "The Pit of Despair". I could not have been hungrier. And I have an hours drive. I didn't think I was going to make it. I was going to need to stop and pick up something to eat. I didn't care if I was late. I couldn't focus. My belly was so hungry it actually hurt. I took some swigs of water and filled it that way. I made it to work and immediatly ate my breakfast. Usually I have a protein bar with me, but it was in my trunk.


I have watched The Biggest Loser and I took my notes. I will type it up after I post this. Usually it takes me a couple of hours to type them so I wanted to get my quick randomness out while I could.


Today's yoga class was a little small. There was a big presentation going on across the hall. They even had food outside in the hall for them. You know, there's nothing like yoga when you can smell food right there. BAH!

Class was good. It was very Back oriented. That was good. I could always use that. Our big challenge was assisted backbends. I attempted, but I coudln't get very far. My body is so tight from my weights and my back is a tad crooked. I wish I could have. I can do it if I ease into it on my yoga ball, but I can't just lean back into it from the standing position.

After class it was a free for all for the food. I grabbed a half of a turkey sandwhich, a half of a veggie wrap, some pasta salad, and a cookie.

Good news!  My leftover pizza is now my dinner!

The original plan was to hit the gym tonight. But, Gym Buddy Lisa is still sick. Plus I really played around with my back in yoga. I really needed an oil change. So instead I went to get one tonight. If I had been planning ahead on this I would have brought my study material. It's the perfect time for it, but instead I could just read my book. Oh well, since that's one less thing I have to do this weekend that's another hour that I can spend at the library!

The Good news is that I had my flashcards with me so I studied that while I was waiting. YEAH.

And speaking of studying. I was talking with Former Work Husband Phil the other day about studying the anatomy chapter. He suggested that I pick two muscles a day and try to work them into casual conversation.  So these are our last texts:

FWHP: I did pushups this morning. I could really feel it in my latissimus dorsi.

Me: Thanks!  I ran # miles in # hours and my glutius maximus is in pain.

FWHP: See! Two muscles mentioned today.

I heart FWHP!  I miss him so.


Have a Blessed Night.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Everything is better with Cheese

Hello My Lovelies and Gents,

My name is Jennie and I'm a cheese-a-holic.  I have decided that today I will share my Random Cheese Thoughts.


Seriously, my philosophy in life has always been: If you don't like it, put some cheese on it. EVERYTHING tastes better with cheese.

For years that's pretty much the only way I would eat vegetables. Plain broccoli? ICK. Melt some cheese on broccoli...well now I might even have a second helping.  Plain Cauliflower? No thank you. Cauliflower smothered in cheese? Yes Please!


I heart cheese so much that the idea of a hamburger is just stupid to me. Why have a plain burger when you can have a CHEESEburger???  Why that's just plain silly. Don't even get me started on tomato pie. I know that it's hugely popular locally, but give me a break. I mean I'll eat a slice, but the whole time I am sitting there thinking "Why so cheap? What's wrong with you that you can't put cheese on this and stick it in the oven?"


There are very few cheeses that I don't like. I'm not a huge fan of goat cheese, blue cheese, and swiss cheese. Although I like swiss cheese if it's heated. I am not including cottage cheese because I don't consider that real cheese.

Sometimes I feel like Bubba in Forrest Gump when it comes to cheese. "Well my favorite's muenster cheese. And then we got mozzarella cheese. Provolone. American. Cheddar mild. Cheddar sharp. We got cheez whiz. Velveeta. Swiss. Asagio. Then we got the Jacks: Monterey, Pepper and Colby. Feta. Harvarti...mmm Harvarti. Cream Cheese. Gouda. Parmesan."


If there's a plate of cheese and crackers...well that's where you'll find me.  Shoot it could be a plate of cheese and card board and I would eat it.


Last night at book club there were some interesting cheeses. I believe one was a blueberry goat cheese. I really wish I liked goat cheese. It looked soooooo good. I just don't though. There was also a cheese with a cinnamin topping...oooh dear Lord why must you tempt me so?

I heart cheese so much that even my favorite cake is a cheesecake. Come on! Two of my favorite things in one: Cake and Cheese. It's a win win situation.

I like soft pretzels. I like soft pretzels with mustard. I LOVE soft pretzels with a cheese dip. I will lick that cheese dip container clean. OMG do you know those little cracker and cheese packs that give you the red plastic knife to spread the cheese on your cracker? I will scrap that cheese container clean. You wouldn't even know there was anything in there in the first place.

Sometimes I wonder about World Peace. If they served every meal at World Summit's with cheese on it, I'm pretty sure that would be the end of all conflict.


If I am making a sandwich with cheese, I will eat twice as many slices while I am actually preparing the sandwich. I'm lucky anything makes it between the bread.


The best bite of pizza is the one that brings all of the cheese with it. And then it's just a sad slice of cheeseless pizza. Hardly worth eating. If it's cold then it's a tomato pie at that point. I mean seriously, I am the girl that only wants extra cheese. Other toppings just take up cheese space.

OH and speaking of pizza, nothing, and I mean NOTHING excites me more than when I pull out a slice that pulls extra cheese from some other poor sucker's slice. BWAHAHAHA ALL MINE! 

And don't even think about scraping that cheese off of the lid. I will break your fingers before I let you take it over me!

I have seriously considered moving to Wisconsin. I think of it as my Mecca. Hello cheese capital!

I honestly don't know what I would do if I was lactose intolerant. I think I would have to take my chances. You can't make me give up the cheese!  NEVER!

I am not a wine drinker. Going to a wine tasting doesn't really appeal to me. Offer me a wine tasting with a plate of cheese and I'm your girl!  I'll drive!  Let's go!

The hardest part of eating healthy has been cutting back on my cheese. I'm not even kidding. Reluctantly, I have cut back though. The only cheese I buy regularly these days are skim milk cheese sticks for my morning snack and skim milk shredded mozzarella cheese to sprinkle sparingly on my egg whites or pasta.  It's so sad. Remind me that my body is thanking me for this.

Have a Blessed Night my friends.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

I'm now on instagram: Jennie5973

Monday, February 25, 2013

Food food everywhere there's food

Happy Monday Bleeps!

Just a reminder that I  missed The Biggest Loser tonight so my update will probably be posted later than usual this week.


So it feels like the harder I try to behave with my food the more it is thrown at me. I can't escape. Seriously, for those of you who aren't food addicts you probably don't understand. I can't even escape by listening to a book on cd.

The book on cd I am listening to right now has a man going back to Mississippi where he grew up. I am hearing about every single meal that he is having. And I LOVE Southern cooking so this is torture. I think you all know by now that they way to my heart is through good BBQ.

A lot of the food talk in the book centers around how it affects his diabetes and how it triggers memories from when he was a kid. But, I kid you not, not 10 minutes goes by before someone is offering to fry him up something or talk about how poor they were as a kid that they stole steaks. It's killing me. If I wasn't so invested in the story (and only one cd to go) I would totally stop listening. Seriously though, I have no idea what he says for a full minute after he mentions some new meal because my trigger is to salivate and imagine sitting and eating it. I have had to rewind on more than one occasion and then I have to listen to the description all over again. It's a vicious cycle.

It didn't help that my drive home last night took me past many many BBQ places. Luckily they are closed for the season or I would have been in some serious trouble.


I can't even talk about the commercials for food while I was watching the race..or the commericials for food competition shows. Luckily I am not really into those shows. It's probably because it would just be too much torture. I can't smell or taste the food and there's no way in heck I could actually make it (as they don't exactly post the recipes). Some of the cooks are too mean. I can't be bothered with that much negativity around food. Besides, watching how they cook stuff kills me now that I am conscious of butter, cream, and frying.


So I tried to be good and walk into the grocery story going only to the vegetable section. I needed to pick up a few things before I got on the road yesterday. And what is sitting there smack dab in the middle of the veggetables? A cookie display!  COME ON!


The DC Half marathon is just under 3 weeks away. I'm very excited, but I'm even more excited that I am going to meet up with some friends from college. I haven't seen them since the 90's and they are moving to Thailand for two years. Of course I am pissed that I let so many years go by without meeting up, but I can only look forward not backwards.

We were trying to figure out where to meet and what to do. I would love to go to the zoo, but it's too early to figure out how my feet will fare with the race and how nice the weather will be. So instead we went on the search for food. I seem to have this habbit of picking places I want to eat weeks/months before the actual event.  That gives me plenty of time to fantisize over the food and drool. Since it's race weekend and my rule on race weekend is "I can eat anything I want for the next two days" we have selected the Cheesecake Factory....I can taste it now.


So tonight was book club. We discussed a memoir called The Orchard. What's life like on an apple farm? I used to imagine it as a wonderful place. Apples are my favorite fruit. And now I may never eat another one as long as I live.

At first I was drooling over the diffent types (my favorite is MacIntosh) and the different uses for some. Some apples are grown for baking not just eating fresh. I could smell the apples as I was reading. And then I learned about the chemicals. I can now only eat organic apples.

Since we are supposed to bring treats to book club there has been discussion about bringing apple goodies. I'm a tad hesitant. I seriously have not had one since I finished the book.

I'm also quite pissed at myself because my treat for book club are the frosted sugar cookies I heart so much. I use this as my treat to get them. I don't otherwise. But, I so want to bring that healthy option. It's just really hard when I haven't been at home since 6:45am and I don't always know what my refrigeration options are. That's no excuse though. I just haven't tried hard enough. 

The good news is that I sat off to the side and didn't partake in any of the goodies except a bottle of water. I would like to say that it's because I was behaving, but the truth is I was starting to get a sinus headache and I didn't feel like eating...even though someone brought the Starbucks cranberry bliss bars that I heart so much...damn headache!


Have a Blessed Night.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Sunday, February 24, 2013

Looking For Prince Charming...

Hello Beautiful People,

And I mean that.  I wish I could give each and every one of you a hug and tell you just how beautiful you are! 

So I had been thinking about this post for a while and then someone left a comment on a post from earlier this week. This one's for you Anonymous.

Anonymous is single and self sabotages using "being fat and ugly" as an excuse.  Anonymous fears losing the weight because what if that's not the excuse for being single? Why can other fat people find a spouse?

Been there. Man, I used fat to keep others away for many years. I was not happy with myself so how could I expect someone to be happy with me?  And what if I couldn't find that person even if I lost the weight?  What would that say about me?

I don't worry about that now. I'm losing the weight. I'm believing in myself. I am happy with myself. I am also that person that annoyed the Former Fat Girl. She was jealous of people like me. She was jealous because she didn't believe that she had it in her to do the things that I can do now. She was annoyed because people like the new me reminded her just how much she needed to change. It was so much easier to lose herself into tv and a pizza.

The guys that I had past relationships with were not good for me mentally and physically. Collaboratively there was a lot of alcohol, junk food, and inactivity. Even as I was starting to make the changes it was very hard to be in a relationship someone who butted heads with me at every turn when it came to healthy foods and exercise. If he didn't want to do it, then it wasn't an option. ARGH. So not good for me.

I know that my Prince Charming it out there somewhere. Maybe I'll meet him tomorrow or maybe next year. But, I know that I'm not going to settle for anything less than I deserve. I see some friends in relationships that make me cringe. They aren't happy, but would rather be with someone that makes them miserable than be on their own. No way. I deserve better!  And so I won't settle for anything less than someone who has the same values and lifestyle as I do.  And make no mistake about it, it's going to be someone who supports me and my new healthy/fit lifestyle.  Anything less than that is not an option.

I don't know who God has planned for me, but I am very excited and know that he'll be worth the wait.

Have a Blessed Night my friends.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

I'm now on instagram: Jennie5973

Saturday, February 23, 2013

I need my elastic waist pants...STAT!

Hello my Lovelies and Gents,

Wow what a crazy day it's been. I don't even know what to focus on right now.

I started the day resisting the alarm. I just didn't have it in me to do any yoga before I packed on got on the road. Besides, I was a lot stuffed up when I woke up and considering Yoga is all about the breathing I realized that was probably not the best idea. So I packed and got on the road.

I stopped at Subway on my way because I got so hungry.  I had some egg whites for breakfast and if I hadn't made so many little stops I would have made it to dad's in time for lunch. I'm glad I stopped though. It's Februany and all foot-longs are $5. So I got my oven roasted chicken with spinach, tomatoes, cucumbers and honey mustard.  I asked them to wrap half to go and I ate half there.

When I got to the house the Nationwide race at Daytona was on. And yes, Tony Stewart was racing today. I had hoped to study, but the race was on and then the Syracuse/Georgetown game was coming on at 4. I would not be able to focus. So I knitted a little and watched the race.

I'm sure you've seen the news by now. On the last lap there was a horrific accident. All of the drivers are okay, but one car hit the fence. His engine and a front wheel burst through the fence while another wheel flew over it into the stands. Tony Stewart (call me!) won, and in fact was the only driver to cross the finish line, but there was no celebration.  Basically for the last 5 hours I've been following the news. It's not good. some people were seriously hurt. 

And the game..well that SUCKED!  I don't know what happened to my Orange, but they did not show up to play today. :-(  Thank goodness Tony won. That was the one bright spot on my sad sports day.

So we went out to dinner. I picked my favorite place Tequila Mockingbird...I needed a margarita!

Before we went out I changed my pants. I was wearing sweatpants, but I knew that I needed to put on some jeans or I would over eat. I needed the waist to give me some boundaries.

I ordered my frozen strawberry margarita (I really did look for a skinny, but didn't see one on the menu). I flip flopped on my dinner, but I chose a pretty awesome salad: Grilled chicken, avocados, corn and black bean salsa, cucumbers, and romaine lettuce. I substituted the ranch dressing for a caribbean vinaigrette. It was yummy. I was pretty happy that it didn't come in a taco shell. I love the fresh salsa at this place. I have a hard enough time with the tortillas and salsa while we wait for our food.

I didn't have that much though and then when the food came I was very happy with it. It was yummy!  I made the mistake of eating all of the good stuff instead of splitting it in half. So when I was full and done the only thing left was lettuce. Dang...not really worth a to-go box. Oh well.

So my food was good and my drink was tasty...and all I wanted to do when we were done was take off my pants. Seriously I could not get up the stairs fast enough to change when we got home. When I unbuttoned the jeans I suddenly thought that maybe going pantless was the answer....bah..I need to burp!

I put on my sweatpants though and brought my laptop down to blog. Just as I opened it up my dad mentioned that there was ice cream in the freezer if I wanted any...I have been sitting here for an hour thinking about it. It's my cheat day. I shouldn't. Today was sucky emotionally though. I shouldn't. Today's a scheduled cheat day though. I shouldn't. I want to though.

Tomorrow is the Daytona 500. Good luck Tony! 

Have a Blessed Night.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Friday, February 22, 2013

Woke up in a puddle of drool...

Happy Friday Beautiful People!

So I'm tired. I'm darn tired. I know I've been feeling a little run down this week and last night it really caught up to me. Let's just say that yesterday was the first day that I thought Yoga at lunch was not the best idea. Sure it relaxed my body, but to what cost?  I was really having a hard time focusing and staying awake for the rest of the afternoon.  I think I might have been a little too relaxed...if that's even possible.

My plan for the night was to run to Old Navy and return a top. Then I was going to head to Panera or Starbucks for some studying and wait out the Rush hour traffic. When I took back the shirt I just sat in my car thinking. Would I be able to focus and study if all I could think of was "It's still going to be another hour before I get home"?  The answer is NO.  So I headed home.

First I made one quick stop at TJ Maxx to check out leggings for the race next month. And let me tell you something, that was not fun. I had just taken a shirt back to Old Navy because it was too big. That actually was fun. It was a medium too! I was feeling all good about it and then I hit the racks for pants.  They are a tough call. Depending on the cut I could be a large or a medium. So I grabbed a little of both.

I'm mad at myself for even taking the large in there with me. I just returned a MEDIUM top (and that's with my boobs!) and here I am picking out Large pants.   Pants are hard enough for me to find good fits for because of my length-challenged legs. I am happy to report that I found a pair of mediums that I absolutely adored. They are so soft and truly I would wear them every day with a sweatshirt if I was allowed.

So I got my pants and headed straight home. I could not make dinner and put on my PJs fast enough.  Thursdays are the one night that I really like to watch tv all night. I like Big Bang Theory, Parks & Recreation, The Office, and Elementary. I hardly ever make it to the end of that though.  And generally I'm busy doing stuff while I watch.  Last night was so not one of those nights. I sat like a blob. I laughed and laughed and then passed out asleep. I didn't even make it to the start of Elementary. I fell asleep sitting up in bed with my contacts in. When I woke up my head was hanging forward and I had a strand of drool going from my mouth to my shoulder. Ewww. I got up and took my contacts out. I had hoped maybe that would wake me up. But no. I then woke up an hour later while Elemantary was almost over and my face was smashed into my pillow with a puddle of drool under it. How I didn't break my glasses is a miracle.

I guess I was tired. I feel like I have been fighting off getting sick all week...argh.

And so with 3 weeks to go until Race Day I am taking it easy for a few days. My body is exhausted. I need to give it some rest before I get sick and that really holds me back.

This of course will stress me out. I am going away this weekend. Monday I have book club. Wednesday I have a church discussion. Basically I am keeping it light until Tuesday's long distance run. I will try to do a yoga dvd (the weather is too sucky for a walk/run) in the morning (upper body at the gym tonight) and hopefully get in an hour's walk on sunday between church and the Daytona 500.  It's going to suck mentally, but my body needs this. As much as I want to keep up my training I need to be smart.

This is why it's so important to plan ahead. I know what days I can "rest" and what days I will be doing a certain workout. I know my yoga days. I know my distance days. I know my weights days. So as much as it will pain me to rest myself, it's okay because I know what's coming and I know that I will be back on track. I is so important to pay attention to your body and listen to it. Mine is screaming at me. I got the message. We shall rest.

I also need to really focus on what I am eating for this week. The cheat day must be limited and my meals need to be lean. What I can't stress enough is that if you absolutely do not have the time to get your workouts in, then it is very important to eat healthy. Cut out the junk. You'll feel better and more energized...and that may just give you some extra time to include that workout. :-)

I mean I really need to take care of myself. What if Tony Stewart calls and I'm too sick to talk to him?  On that note, Good Luck this Sunday Tony!  And um...Call me! (seriously, if I have readers all over the world there has to be someone in North Carolina or Indianapolis who knows him...haha).

Have a Blessed Night my friends.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

I'm now on instagram: Jennie5973

Thursday, February 21, 2013

Afraid of the Pain

Hello my Lovelies and Gents,

Gosh I have so many topics that I want to talk about. I basically have a backlog of ideas.  I actually made a list on my phone so that I don't forget them all. One that I have been thinking about for a while is dealing with the Pain. This can apply both physically and mentally, but right now I want to focus on the physical.

The Former Fat Girl was scared of pain. She didn't want to exert herself because she didn't want to feel it later. She LOVED walking around and exploring whatever city she was in, but in a limited capacity.  As much as she loved walking and seeing the sites, if there was a subway to be taken...well she was all in for the short cut.  If the walking was for any extended period of time then she cleared her schedule for the next day because there was no way she was getting off of the couch. In fact, any day of activity pretty much cleared her for the rest of the week. She could nurse that "sore back" for days.

If she did a workout dvd and felt sore later that dvd got put away for another month...or two...or it was never to be seen again. Her body was uncomfortable with this activity and she didn't like it. And rather than increase the activity so that it would no longer hurt, she dove into inactivity with avengence. "My legs and back hurt so bad after that walk that I need to just lay in bed for a couple of days to give them rest."

Looking back, I realize that it wasn't about the "pain". It was about facing myself. It was about acknowledging that I was in bad shape. It was about being unhappy with myself and shying away from the uncomfortable. I knew that I wasn't in shape. I couldn't look in a mirror for goodness sake. I didn't need my body's pain to remind me.  I was in pain anyway just carrying that weight around every moment of every day. Why would I want to increase that?  It was so much easier to escape into a tv show while eating a box of cheez-its than it was to get up and move around.

What I know now is that there is a big difference between sore and pain. Sore means that I'm using my muscles in ways that they are not used to or that I have upped my intensity. Pain means that something is wrong and I need to rest and heal. The Former Fat Girl used "sore" as an excuse not to get injured.

The way I like to think of it now is that if I have never gardened in my life and I got out there and start weeding the yard for a couple of hours then in two days I am going to be feeling muscles I never knew I had. That doesn't mean I did anything wrong. It just means that I'm waking my body.  If I continue to go out there every day then eventually it won't hurt. My body will get used to it. My Body will welcome it. It's the same with working out. Eventually it will stop making you sore and be a lot easier.  Eventually your body will crave it!

What you need to remember is the Two Day rule. After an incredibly intense workout you will feel sore the next day. But, you will feel even more sore the day after that.  It's your muscles rebuilding. Know the difference between sore and hurt. If you don't feel better after two days then you may be injured. You may also still be sore, but it should not be equal to or worse than day two.

I have learned to embrace the pain (sore). That means that I am pushing my body. I am working hard. If I don't feel sore then I'm not going to make changes in my body. I need the sore to know that I am still on the right track. I need the sore to know that I am on my way to my flat belly. I need the sore to know that I am on my way to my future butt!  I need the sore to know that I am on my way to smaller boobs.   It's when I don't feel the sore that I need to worry.

Every crossfit class kicked my butt. I was sore for two days after each one. It sucked, but it felt so good. As active as I am, I was challenging my body in ways it wasn't used to. And what happened? I burst through my plateau! 

What I also know now is just how important stretching is. I can minimize the soreness by stretching before and after the workouts. Heck, I stretch now even if I am just sitting around. I WANT to use my muscles now. If all I am doing now is tightening them then they will be sore a lot. By stretching I am lessening the pain and increasing my mobility. That's one of the reasons why I love yoga so much. I always feel 100% better afterwards. It's my reward to my body for all of the hard work I am putting it through.  And a massage every now and then doesn't hurt either. Haha.

Have a Blessed Night.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

All Sorts of Random Wednesday: Green Tutu and Eddie Murphy

It's Random Wednesday Y'all!

Well we are less than a month away from the DC Half Marathon and things are kicking into high gear. Last night was my dress rehearsal. Since I am participating for Run for Autism I needed to break in my running top. I've been struggling with this. The first time I put it on it looked horrible on me. It was big in some places and tight in others.

I'm also having a hard time with the color. It's Teal, Gold, and Navy Blue. I can wear it with my navy blue shorts if it's warm enough, but what if I want to wear pants?

So last night I put it on with a tank top underneath and black yoga pants. I wasn't 100% happy, but it's better than I had hoped.

The one thing that drove me nuts was when I saw my under arms flapping. My arms are 95% the way I want. But, I have some under arm flab with stretch marks that had my full attention in the mirror. BAH!


The other night Gym Buddy Lisa mentioned that she had made Spaghetti squash the other night. I have become slightly obsessed with this. I have looked up several recipes and I am anxious to make some. I am away this weekend though, so it looks like I have a project next weekend.


I was doing the calculations the other day and I realized that between the past two Polar Plunges and the Run for Autism I have raised over $1000 for Special Olympics and Autism.  Seriously, I could not be more excited. Well I could...I want to raise more!

Sunday while I was at the gym an Eddie Murphy movie was on the TV in front of me. It was next to the Fox TV which was covering Daytona qualifying which is the reason I was in that area. I had not seen this movie before, but I was completely offended and repulsed. There was this enormous woman strutting around in tiny outfits, including a thong bikini.  In one scene she comes down this really high water slide and she is so big that her momentum shoots her over the pool, through the fence, and lands in the kiddie pool emptying it of water.

I'm not going to lie, this movie was so horrifying for me. I couldn't focus on my workout because I didn't want to look up. I couldn't believe someone would put themselves out there like that. And of course I looked it up and found out that it was Eddie Murphy in a fat suit. Why does he have to resort to dressing in fat suits in just about every movie?  He's plenty funny without that...but, I'm not going to be very hesitant about watching any of his movies...well except for Coming to America because I love that one.


So if you are asking yourself "Hey, I wonder if Jennie is going to dress up for St. Patrick's day for her race?" the answer is YES!  On my list of things to do this past weekend was to pick up my green tutu. I had to pass on anything for my head because I can't be distracted with things falling all over up there.

I am not sure how I will make the tutu work with the teal and gold, but I will!  I also got some leg warmers in case I go with shorts.  The problem is that I sort of need to get in a practice run wearing it to make sure it doesn't fall off and I just can't see doing that in the gym. haha. Gym Crush Big Dude will NEVER talk to me if I do that. haha.

The irony is that I totally want to wear the tutu all over the place.


I am going to steal a line from Super Fan MaryAnn: I am not "Living to Eat" anymore. I am "Eating to Live."  LOVE HER AND LOVE THAT!


So last night I had a great run at the gym. It was my longest and fastest to date. I might have gone a little longer, but I was a tad hungry and I needed to stretch. I also opted for a water massage (which in all honesty I barely felt and it was on high, but I feel fine today :-)

On my way home I was trying to think about my dinner. What would I have when I got home? Should I stop at Subway? Then I came up upon Wendy's and I smelled the I wanted to stop SOOOO bad!  But, I remained strong and went home for some mexican eggwhite scramble and a veggie hummus wrap. I done good.


Today I attended a presentation for a prepared food delivery service. It's fresh food all vegetable protein based. We had a sample meal and I had the Lentil burger with cilantro dressing on Kale, eggplant, and tomatoes. It was yummy.  I liked the theory behind this company. They use local restaurants and minimal salt and oil. The food is fresh and good. It's also way out of my price range. If I had the money I would probably do it. But, one week's worth is my full food budget for the month.

The headliner band for the Rock'n'Roll race has been announced. Cowboy Mouth will be playing. I didn't know who they are, but I youtubed them. They are pretty good. And their biggest hit is: Jenny Says.  Haha...gotta love them for that!

After my last two nights of running I really wanted to take tonight off. All day I sat at my desk trying to decide. I have laundry to do. I would like to do my nails. I could get a hair cut. I have studying to do.  But, I am going away this weekend. I will plan on working out, but Sunday is church and the Daytona 500 (Tony Stewart CALL ME!) so I don't know that I'll get anything in that day. And then Monday is bible study and book club. So I am looking at back to back days of rest coming up. That means I had to get my butt to the gym.  And I did. I went for a 30 minute walk on an incline. So I got my workout in and got home in time for the start of the Syracuse game. HOLLA! 

Tomorrow's plan is to wait to hear if Gym Buddy Lisa is going to be home in time for the gym. I do have yoga during lunch so if she isn't going then I will come home and make it a study night.

So next week's post on the Biggest Loser will be late. I have book club that night so I will need to watch it the next night.  Depending on how my long distance run goes at the gym I may just be able to post late in the night. Or it will need to wait until Thursday.


Have a Blessed Night my friends.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

I'm now on instagram: Jennie5973

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

The Biggest Loser Season 14 - Episode 8

Alright let's get down to it because as Dolvett says "It's always Crazy week 8!"

When the contestants walk in after elimination Jeff wants everyone to know that it wasn't gameplay that made him vote for Mike. He and Francelina are close and she motivates him. We soon find out that they both lost their fathers at a young age and this has helped them bond.

Then Allison walks in and tells them that this week's theme is: Working Together. If they can lose 70 lbs as a group then no one goes home. But, there's a chance that that they can lower that number. Bring in the kids!  YEAH!

It's been a little while since they have been back and Joe comments right away how great they look.

Okay so there is a 2 part challenge. First, the kids will have 5 nutrition questions. For every question they get right they get a pound advantage. Second, the kids will take the physical challenge that they took during week one. If they improve their numbers on the 5 exercises they will get a pound advantage for each.

Starting with the questions.

1- Which has more fat:
   2 large eggs with 2 pieces of turkey bacon or 1 plain bagel with cream cheese.
   The kids guess the eggs and bacon.
   They are correct.

2-How many chicken nuggets does it take for 18 grams of fat:
    20 or 6
    The kids guess 6.
     They are correct.

3-Which has more carbohydrates:
     Spaghetti with meat sauce and garlic bread or a Bean burrito with salsa
     The kids guess Spaghetti.
     They are wrong. But, all of the adults said they would have guessed that too.

4-Which has more calories:
     Double cheeseburger or Large french fries
     The kids guess french fries.
     They are correct.

5-Which movie food is over 1000 calories:
     A personal pizza or a large bucket of popcorn
     The kids guess the popcorn.
     They are correct.

So far the kids have knocked 4 lbs off of the total.

Now it's time for the exercises. The kids get to pick which one of them will compete.

     Biingo originally did 18 situps in a minute. This time he does 35.

     Lindsay originally did 37 in a minutes. This time she does 79.

    I missed how many Biingo originally did, but he does 32 this time.

    Lindsay originally did 35 seconds.  This time she does 32.

5-1 mile run
     Sunny originally ran a 13 minute mile. This time she wants to push herself for a 10 minute mile. 
     Danni runs with her and can barely keep up in the beginning. Towards the end of the mile most of
     the contestants are running with her. She nails it at 9:59!

The kids have earn a 9lb advantage for them.

Time for the workouts.

Bob pulls Francelina aside and talks to her about her past. She had lost 100lbs at home. She shared that when she was 16 her father passed away. He had a brain tumor. This inspired her to want to be a doctor, but she was too embarrassed about her size for her interviews.

No sooner does Dolvett say that Week 8 is always crazy then Gina walks out of the gym. He pushed her and she got a little snarky with him. He joked that he loves lawyers (she's a lawyer) and Joe said he did too. This got to her. She didn't think Joe was kidding and she didn't want to be around him.

Follow Up

Nate came to the Biggest Loser ranch weighing 359 lbs. He now weighs 269 lbs and has lost 90 lbs. He said that Jillian is definitely invited to the wedding because he would not be the man he is today without her. Awwwww.

Back on the Ranch

While Gina is outside Jackson comments that the them is Working Together and yet No One is Working Together.

Dolvett says that Gina is always looking for excuses. But, he tells her that hey will separate her and Joe and he will work directly with her.

Jillian puts Alex on the treadmill. She says that she's seen her "phoning it in" for weeks. She asks her to run for 5 minutes and Alex quits after 1 minute. Jillian then pulls Gina to the treadmill and she quits running after a minute.

And this is where Jillian flips out on the other trainers. She says that they are on month 3 at the ranch and they have contestants that can't run for more than a minute.

She and Bob start yelling at each other. Bob says look at the progress. It's on the scale. But, they both agree that at this point in time that lack of time for running is not okay.

Jillian corners Alex in the kitchen. She says that she is young and uninjured. There is no reason why she can't run.   Alex says that she's always hearing "Your best is never good enough.  You're pretty, but not pretty enough. You're smart, but not smart enough."  Telling her that she has such a pretty face is giving a compliment, but stabbing her in the heart at the same time. Jillian said that she finally got the answer she was looking for.

Team Challenge

They are on the beach and there are various mounds of sand. They have 30 minutes to dig through the piles and follow the arrows through 5 sets of hills. After 5 sets they will pick up a giant flag pole and carry it down the pier and put it in the stand. If they can finish in under 30 minutes they get another 10 lb advantage.

Danni remarks that it's not just sand. It's wet piled sand and hard to lift. On one of the first hills she gets nailed in the ankle with a shovel.

Time is getting close, but when they have a few minutes left and they are running in the sand with the flag Gina falls. Joe is there to pick her up. Awwww....they make it with 5 seconds to spare.

Back on the Ranch

They are all sitting around on the patio when Jarrod from Subway walks in with sandwiches for them. It's his 15th anniversary since he lost the weight and he's kept it off. He tells them that the great thing about his Subway diet was that he never felt like he was on a diet.

Then he tells them that not only will the winner get $250,000, but they will also star in a commercial for Subway with him.

Seventeen Challenge

Seventeen magazine is promoting a Body Peace Treaty. Jillian mentions that 11% of all girls don't feel comfortable calling themselves "beautiful". So Seventeen is asking girls to sign a Body Peace Treaty to let them know just how beautiful they are.

Last Chance Workout

Since the theme is Working Together, the last chance workout is a Ropes Course for team building. They will be teamed up and will need to climb a pole and lean on each other as the walk on two wires that are gradually getting further away. They must rely on the other person to keep from falling.

Jillian: "You may not trust each other, but you have to learn to work together."

The teams are set up:
Jeff and Francelina
Danni and Jackson
Alex and Jillian
Joe and Gina
Bob and Dolvett

There are some very sweet moments, but it's here that we learn that there may be some love in the air between Jeff and Francelina.

Weigh In

They need 51lbs for everyone to stay on the ranch this week. If they don't reach 51 lbs then there is a Red line. It's not even yellow. There will be no elimination voting.

*Danni started at 201 lbs and now weighs 194 lbs for a total of 7 lbs.  She is in Onederland!  She is finally having her "Why not me?" Moments.
*Joe started at 364 lbs and now weighs 358 lbs for a total of 6 lbs.
*Jackson started at 266 lbs and now weighs 261 lbs for a total of 5 lbs.  Bob says that Jackson is "Easy Breezy"
*Alex started at 198 lbs and now weighs 195 lbs for a total of 3 lbs.  She says that's not what she wanted, but what she expected. Bob gets mad. He says that if that's what she expects, that's what she's going to get.
*Jeff started at 312 lbs and now weighs 308 lbs for a total of 4 lbs.
*Gina started at 184 lbs and now weighs 180 lbs for a total of 4 lbs. She apologizes to Jillian for disrespecting her. Allison said that she thought 4 lbs was good, but Bob says that she's good for 6 or 7 lbs. Dolvett tells her that this is what's going to happen if she lets her distractions get to her.
*Francelina started at 213 lbs and now weighs 211 lbs for a total of 2 lbs. She needed 3 lbs to be safe.

Everyone is shocked. Bob tells her that she deserves the world.

Francelina: "In the past I couldn't keep it off because I didn't understand that I had to deal with what's on the inside too."

Jeff says that it's not bittersweet, it's just bitter.

Before she leaves Francelina says that "All of this weight has been covering up this amazing person." She is soooooo right!  Love her!

Francelina Today

She started on the Biggest Loser ranch at 267 lbs and now weighs 190 lbs. She looks fantastic. She is managing her stress with fitness. She loves to go out latin dancing and she's dedicated to applying to Medical school and taking prep classes.

She also admits that when she was leaving the ranch the feelings that she and Jeff had for each other suddenly became obvious that they were more than just friends. They are now dating and she has plans to move to Chicago with Jeff. Awwww

Next week: 

They are down to the Final 6 and must face their fears. And Sunny has a talk with her mom that no one wants to have to do. She tells her of her fear of her mom dying because of her poor health.

Have a Blessed Night.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Monday, February 18, 2013

Fueling with food instead of crap

Happy Monday Bleeps!

And what a fine freezing holiday Monday it is. Brrrr....

So today is President's Day and my company has the day off. However, one of my customers does not. I get to work.  I probably could have pushed to work from home, but I made plans to hit the gym after work with Gym Buddy Lisa.

I was totally rethinking that plan as I ventured to my car this morning and my fingers darn near froze just walking to the car. Really cold days make me nervous. They are days that all I really want to do is curl up under a warm blanket, watch movies, and snack. It makes me want to be lazy and very inactive. Argh!  I have worked too hard to be taken down by the cold!

Okay so I had planned on going out to lunch with a friend today. She couldn't make it so I was on my own. I wanted Panera's tomato soup and grilled cheese so bad I could taste it. Calories be damned! It's too cold not to do this.

When I got there I did not even look at the menu. I didn't want to veer from my original plan. I also managed to avoid looking down next to me where all of the tasty cookies were on the counter. I passed on any extras. Normally I would get an apple, but I just finished reading a book about life on an Apple Orchard and I'm a little too afraid of chemicals right now. Besides, the last time I really wanted some extra bread to soak up the last of the soup.

I also got a diet soda. Normally I get caffiene free, but man today was rough getting up. I did NOT want to go to work. And so all afternoon I was sipping on this soda and I started to panic around 4pm. CRAP! I can feel my body bloating from the sodium.  I have only had 20 oz of water today. I need 20 more before the gym. Why the panic?  Well that's simple. My body was not fueled for the gym.

Did I mention that I had a very stressful hour when I came back from lunch? The food was good, but it didn't fill me up completely and I happened to have a bag of cheddar chex mix in my locker. I inhaled a third of the bag. I was so mad at myself and quite frankly I couldn't stop. My brain was sayinig "STOP!", but my body was reacting to the stress and before I knew it I was shoving another handful in my mouth. My body was so not listening to my brain.

So now I had stuffed myself on junk and soda. I will be able to do a workout, but I'm not going to feel like I am at my best. I was planning on a run tonight too because I had a bunch of pasta last night and I didn't want that carb overload to go to waste.

*Quick catch up on last night: Yesterday I hit the gym after church for 6 miles. I was running late to get home, but I needed to stop for lunch. I got a sandwich, but that's all. So when I got to grandmom's for some more packing I was a bit hungry. Had some chicken, spinach, and a salad. It was good, but the portions were small for me and I was still hungry. Grandmom offered to make me some angel hair pasta. I only needed a cupful, but I got a big giant bowlful. I ended up eating too much and felt a little too full. The good news is that I am planning 2 hours of training tomorrow night so I will carb up tonight with my leftovers. Thanks Gradnmom :-)  *

Eating right is so critical to maitaining a good workout schedule. I think we all know that I am good for long workouts 6 days a week. If I wasn't eating right that would drop drastically. On days when I don't eat as well as I should my body completely reacts. It holds me back. It's not as fast, not as strong, and doesn't have the endurance that it should. I feel like I let it down when I am not eating right.

I think back to those pizza-cheeseburger-fries-cheesesteaks-mac'n'cheese-diet coke days and I cringe. No wonder I never wanted to workout. I always felt like crap when I made the effort. I was feeding my body junk and was getting no effort from my body. I hated exercise and what I truly did not comprehend was just crucial fueling my body in a good way actually is. BAH! I get so frustrated thinking about those wasted years.

Why did I choose the food over my health?

So here's two little bonuses from last night. First, I hadn't seen my mom since Christmas and the first thing she did was grab my face and say how it's gotten skinnier since she saw me. She can see where the 10lbs went (11!).   Second, grandmom handed me a tiny pair of jeans that she said would fit me. I took them, but in my head I'm thinking "This woman is crazy! There is no way these tiny little grandmom jeans are going to fit me!"...But, I tried them this morning and they do!  WOO WOO! I can fit in my tiny grandmom's tiny jeans. They are actually cute too.

And now it is time to make amends. No more binging like today. What if Tony Stewart called and I had a face full of Chex Mix?  Never again I say!  I threw out the rest of the bag. So um...Tony, feel free to call me.

Have a Blessed Night my friends.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

I'm now on instagram: Jennie5973

Saturday, February 16, 2013

Using my downtime for Good and not Evil

Happy Saturday Bleeps!

Why is it still snowing?????  I really wanted to get outside for a nice walk today, but, it ain't happening. Actually last night Gym Buddy Lisa and I did an upper body workout. I hadn't done one in the gym in over a month because I didn't want to be sore for crossfit.

I could feel my muscles all night and figured I would just do yoga in the morning to stretch it out. And then I woke up at 6:30am. WHAT? On a Saturday?  COME ON!

So I read for a couple of hours and thought I might fall back asleep for a little bit. And I did, but when I woke up my lower back was out of alignment and I couldn't move.  It happens every now and then and I know that it will align when I am in a seated position. The problem is that I couldn't lift into a seated position. I laid there for a little while rolling to each side trying to sit up and eventually I rolled my legs off of the bed and stood up.

Everything was fine a few minutes later, but man that was rough. So I opted to skip yoga and just rest my body today. I will be going to grandmom's in a little while to help do some more packing and I want to be nice and fresh for that.

I used the time to do some straightening and laundry. I really truly need more time in my days. I really am hardly ever home. I try to keep things straightened, but sometimes when I get home I am just plain tired. I feel so much better when things are uncluttered. I feel like I can focus.  I knocked some things off of my list and now I'm ready to study!

It kind of sucked not to have a regular workout today, but I'm trying to embrace my new schedule. The reality is that because of my commute I really just can't get the minutes in the gym that I used to. And because I get home so late every night there's no stopping at the store. A lot falls on my weekends.  I'm planning on going to the gym after church tomorrow for a long distance walk (key word walk...because I aggravated my ankle in yoga on Thursday).  The Half is four weeks from today. I only have three weekends to put in long distances. Although I arranged to skip lunch on Tuesdays from now until then and leave work at 4 for an extra hour in the gym.

I am in good shape. I can afford to cut back on workout time. I am really doing better eating right and I am ramping up my workouts so that my weight doesn't suffer (down another pound!).  As long as I use this down time for good and not evil I will be okay. It needs to be devoted to achieving my Personal Trainer dream and not lazing around eating and watching movies like the Former Fat Girl did.

I must stay active! 

PS-In case you didn't know....tomorrow is qualifying for the Daytona 500 and the race will be next Sunday. So Good Luck Tony Stewart...and don't forget to CALL ME!

Have a Blessed Night.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Friday, February 15, 2013

Randomness on a Friday...

Hello Beautiful People!

I hope you all had a lovely week. I could not be more excited that mine is over!  Ms. Kerri came back from vacation on Thursday and well let's just say that I practically duct taped her to her chair so that she would never leave me again. Ha...well that's not quite going to work because she has the holiday off on Monday and I said I would work since one of our client's is half open...which I still don't understand. How can you be half open?

Anyway, once again I was going to tell you about the Heart Smart webinar I attended this week, but I looked at my notes, and really I need to organize them better before I put together a post on them. I will try for this weekend.

So today will be sort of a Random Friday..don't freak out...I just have a lot in my head and I can't decide what to focus on.


First off, I did it!  I ordered my Personal Trainer Certification package today. WOO WOO!  It felt so good. Because I  have test anxiety and because the test is so expensive I went ahead and ordered the video lecture series along with the exam and study materials. I am a visual person and this should help me out.

I cannot even begin to tell you how much lighter I felt when I did that. Knowing that it's paid for and that's no longer a concern I can jump in head first. Since I've been studying for months I am fairly certain I can do this in April. I want to do it before my birthday. The only thing that would hold me back is Marathon training for next month. And so, that means I am just training to finish, not to increase my time. This is too dang important to me.


And speaking of the Marathon, I am happy to announce that my Aunt has signed up to run with me. YEAH! So excited. We'll have our own little cheering section..and there better be posters with my name on them!  haha.

Also on the Marathon front, I am trying to decide what to wear. It is St. Patrick's Day weekend. I WANT to wear a green tutu and I found some St. Patty's Day Leg the shirt for Run For Autism is teal and's not quite going to work...But I don't care!  I will do it anyway!


So I've been thinking really hard about my little crush on Gym Crush Big Dude. It almost bothers me that I have a crush on him. He is totally the type that I used to like. The bigger guys made me feel smaller. As I lost the weight my tastes changed. I started to be super attracted to the leaner more fit guys. Now GCBD is fit, he's just big and muscular.  Why am I so attracted to him? Is it because I'm starting to see myself as fat again? 

There are good looking men at the gym, but this guy draws my attention like no other. And yes, when I am next to him I feel super tiny.  I really hope that it's a genuine interest and not because I am falling back into an old pattern.

I heart my cousin. Well I heart all of my cousins. But for all of you singles out there, I love that instead of Valentine's Day he celebrates "Singles Awareness!" I think we'll have to come up with a ribbon to wear for that day. Any suggestion on colors? lol.  I am thinking Green with White Polka Dots. haha.


How's the Hula Hooping coming?  I love that I have jumpstarted the Hula Hoop Revolution. The number of friends who tell me that they are pulling out their hula hoops grows every day. And these people are serious!  They have the special weighted ones that break apart for travel. Now that's commitment!  I think I am adding one of those to my birthday list!

So I am about to give up Facebook. If I see that add pop up for a dating services that says: Skinny Girls Not Wanted, then I am quitting! 


So tonight I stopped at Walmart for a few items on my way home. There was a slight incident. Security was tracking a suspected shoplifter and I happened to be in the area every step of the way. The dude was in the aisle that I needed and I saw them watching him so I slipped in to the next aisle to wait it out. Um...I should have looked first. It was the candy aisle. I was looking at chocolate thinking how much I really wanted some.

It felt like I was waiting it out for a long long time, but I don't think it really was that long. But, for a food addict in a chocolate aisle it was an eternity.

Eventually security made their move and then he was pulled into the main aisle. And then when I was checking out the state troopers had him right by the door I needed to leave through. Goodness, this wasn't even happening to me, but it was a stressful situation for me. Honestly, I was there at every turn. What if this guy was a lunatic and went crazy? I don't want to be there...oh look at that kit kat at the checkout! 

I did not buy any.  I wanted to, but I didn't.


So I am very proud to say that I have met my Run for Autism pledge amount. YEAH! The pressure is off...but, I still have two months to raise money and just because I met my amount doesn't meant I shouldn't continue to help others.


Grrrr...I want chocolate!


Have a Blessed Night my friends.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

I'm now on instagram: Jennie5973

Thursday, February 14, 2013

50 Shades of Yoga

Happy Valentine's Day my Lovelies and Gents,

Well I had this wonderful post planned for today. Yesterday I participated in a webinar on a "Healthy Heart".  I figured it would be good timing and I have lots to share from it, but then Yoga happened today and there is much to talk about from it.

It was a smaller group today. We had 6 people: 5 gals and 1 new gent. Plus we had Richard the Instructor. So let me put into context that Ms. Tracey was there and she is a towering 6' plus.  The rest of us ladies are in the 5'-5'3" range. And all of the ladies are on the "tinier than me" scale.

So we started off sitting in a circle with our legs crossed and our knees touching each other. Then we reached out our arms to grab the shoulders of those sitting next to us. We focused on leaning to the right while inhaling and then exhaling while returning to center. And then following on the left side.  Sounds simple enough, but I could really feel the pull in my left hip, which is in alignment with my messed up and super tight right shoulder.

We bent our knees in front of us, held hands, and as a group balanced on our bottoms. Then the rocked back with our breathing and then back up on to our butts. We did this several times until we were to rock back up to a standing position. I gotta be honest. I truly envisioned myself not being able to do it and pull everyone down because we were all linked. I am happy to report that we did it though.

Once we were standing there was some balancing on each leg. We would lean forward with one leg behind us and and let go of each other. If we felt like our back leg was falling we were to grab a hand instead of letting the foot fall to the ground. I really have a hard time with this. My left knee is just so bad and weak that I have difficulty balancing on that leg.

And then the fun stuff really started. While still in the circle we turned to the right and massaged each others shoulders. Then we turned to the left and massaged the spines. Ahhhh....

Time to partner up. The first person would get down on the floor in the push up position. The second person would stand behind them and lift their feet. Person one would be holding themselves up by their arms. Then the second person would let go of one of the feet and the first person will keep holding their legs up.

Did I panic? A little. Did I do it? You betcha!

And then things got Cray Cray!  Did he just say that we are going to plank on top of each other? Hold the phones!  Did he just say were are going to plank on top of each other 3 people high? WHAT?  I will crush these poor girls.   So first he had the other guy as the base of the pile. And then Ms. Tracey got on. And then another girl. I wish I had my camera.

Next up he was the base with the other two girls. I was silently freaking out. There was no way I could climb on any of these girls without taking them down. And so I said I wanted to be the base. He asked if my core was strong enough. Hell yeah it is!  And so I was base. I have no idea which girls planked on top, but yeah, I did it!

I was on top of the world!  Which was appropriate because the next position was the Titanic. We did this last year. The person in front stands with their feet hips length apart. The person behind plants one foot back and one foot forward. The person in front reaches back grabbing the forearms and then leans forward like they are king/queen of the world.

I am great as the person pulling back the king/queen. I have a really hard time being the queen though. The times that I have done it I have been the heavier of the two. I don't know if I would feel more comfortable with someone heavier than me. Someone that I felt for sure would not move because of my weight. It may be that I have just as hard of a time.

Next we faced each other, crossed hands, and held one. And then we leaned back in to the seated position. Once seated we would release one hand and reach back. Then we switched hands.  That was the easy part. We grabbed forearms again and held on as we lowered ourselves into the seated position.

We uncrossed our hands, but still held each others forearms. Our legs were bent in front of us and this is where it started to get challenging. We started with my left leg and her right. We pushed our feet together and up into the air straightening the legs. Still holding arms we did the same with the other legs. So now we were balancing on our bottoms with our legs raised in the air and holding on to each other. As if that wasn't enough, we then lowered one the legs and pushed them out to the side...still holding arms and balancing on our bottoms. We Rocked it!

One of the ladies next to us was saying that she was having a hard time grasping hands. Could we tie our hands together? The instructor said that sometimes they do use scarves or ties for this position. this 50 Shades of Yoga?

Next up was to stand up and stand back to back. We would take turns bending over and lifting the other person on to our backs.  I went first and felt like I could lift her all day long.  When it was her turn to lift me I started to panic. I honestly wasn't sure that she could. For some reason my feet weren't lifting off of the ground when she bent over. Perhaps my back is just super bendy. Eventually one of the guys lifted me up and my back cracked....ahh. That felt good.

Time to relax. We were sent back to our mats in pairs. One person would lay on their belly with their arms by their sides. The other person would stand at their feet and "Penguin walk" the heels of their hands up the legs, skip over the bottom, and then "Penguin walk" them up the back. And then they would kneel into the bottom and pull the person's arms back so far that their chest would rise off of the floor.

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO ME!  Seriously, I told Glenda that I felt like I should buy her lunch or send her flowers after that. I felt so good. I was happy to return the favor.

This may be my most favorite yoga class of all time. It was also one of the hardest for me.  Mentally I was put through the ringer.

Just the thought of relying on any of this ladies to hold me up was pure terror for me. I kept thinking that they were mentally screaming "NO I WANT ANOTHER PARTNER! She's going to squish me!"  I did not think these ladies could hold my weight. I am solid. I have a good 30-40 lbs on them. And that's when it hit me...I am not 200 lbs anymore, but that's how heavy I was feeling. I didn't give these ladies enough credit. They are strong. They are capable. I am smaller than I used to be, but for some reason this class takes me right back to that old weight.

This class was a big lesson in trust. I do have a hard time trusting others, but I also have a hard time trusting myself. It's time to let go and fully believe in myself.

*please note, the pictures attached are not from class, but rather I found them online and am using them as an example of what we did

Have a Blessed Night.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Happy Random (Ash) Wednesday

Happy Random Wednesday Bleeps!

Or as I like to call it, the day after I saw the BLEEPING signs for McDonalds' Shamrock Shakes!  CRAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP.  I have not had one in a few years, but oh how I heart them. But, I have made it this long without going for fast food and I will make it longer...although there's no hard rule against someone bringing me one...


Today I am wearing a blouse that I got for Christmas. It's the first time that I am wearing it. It's a pretty blue bouse with peek-a-boo sleeves exposing my arms and shoulders. It's pretty. I look nice in it. It's driving me CRAZY.

I have to wear a jacket because I am not comfortable exposing the arms like that at work. The bottoms of the sleevs cinch and keep riding up my arms. They are supposed to be elbow length, but under the jacket they are riding up the biceps.

I feel like the Hulk trying to bust out of them.

And that's much better than how the former fat girl felt about sleeves like this. She hated them!  They were just a reminder of how fat the arms were.


I ate too many Girl Scout cookies yesterday :-(


It's Ash Wednesday and for many people that means that it's time to give something up for 40 days. And since it takes 3 weeks to develop a habit I would say that today is a good day to start giving up fast food and sugar.

My dad belongs to the Royal Order of Jesters and suggested at their last meeting that the pledges for next year should participate in the Polar Plunge. YEAH!  See, I am paying it forward!  I may not personally raise the money, but it's just as good if I get more people to participate and raise the money.


I am sad to say that I was unable to go to lunch at the Cheesecake Factory yesterday. It was too busy for me at work to get away. Part of me was relieved that I would not have to face the temptations, but part of me was super sad because I seriously wanted a piece of cheesecake.


I am SOOOO mad at that movie reviewer who made references to Melissa McCarthy's weight in the review of Identity Theft. Would he dare say anything about a man's weight in a movie? He called her a hippo. I want to poke him in the eyes it makes me sooooooo mad. And seriously, resorting to that kind of talk is purely for attention. If he was really good at his job he would review the FILM not the weight of the actress in it. SHAME ON YOU!


So for those of you who are taking my Hula Hoop challenge I have some advice for you. Get a hoop that's a little heavy. The lighter the hoop the harder it is to hula. My pal Ms. Amy suggested that. She's able to do hers for 15 um...I'm going for a heavier one!  And as soon as the snow stops (seriously think the groundhog doesn't know what he's doing) I will go outside and play with it.


Bah! Where is my tax refund???? I want to pay for this Certification!

Have a Blessed Night my friends.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

I'm now on instagram: Jennie5973

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

The Biggest Loser Season 14 - Episode 7

It's Week 7 on the Biggest Loser Ranch...and it's about to start getting Cray Cray!

Last week the Blue team voted off David. The first thing my girl Gina said was "They're stupid for not voting me off." And I've got to agree.

And then Allison walks in and tells them that they are going to Singles. Let the games begin!

As singles they all get new color shirts.

Alex - Green
Gina - Purple
Danni - Pink
Jackson - Yellow
Michael - Grey
Jeff - Aqua
Francelina - Orange
Joe - Maroon

It's Valentine's week and it's no surprise that this is the first week with a Temptation challenge.

Everyone walks into a room with all sorts of treats on the table. Cakes. Cupcakes. Chocolates.  Gina spies a piece of Red Velvet cake that is 580 calories. She mentions that it is half the size of the pieces she used to eat.

Michael confesses that there were many times that he would buy 6 cupcakes for people on his way home and in the 30 minute drive he would eat them all.

*Americans eat 58 million pounds of chocolate a year*

So back to the temptation. Whoever eats the most calories will get a 2lb advantage on the scale this week. They will also get to give a 2 lb advantage to another player.  And since love is blind, the lights will be turned off.

Allison puts on night vision goggles and for ten minutes she watches what happens. Francelina and Alex start right away.

Jackson says that the trainers have been drilling in to their heads that Sugar is bad. I love it when Micheal sits down to avoid the temptation. Danni one-ups him though and lays down to do crunches.

Jeff says that he's not a sweets eater, but he eats some anyway. 

Gina fakes them all out. She makes noises and they all think that she's eating. She says that they are stupid because she is diabetic. She would end up in a coma if she eats.

In the end, Jeff eats 3 pecan clusters for a total of 270 calories.  Alex ate 1036 calories and Francelina ate 1150.  If Alex had  finished her brownie she would have won. "It only works if you win."  Francelina gives the other 2lbs to Alex for working for it. 

Jackson is upset. Francelina is his best friend in the house and realizes that now that it's an Individuals games you can't count on anyone.

Michael says that it's obvious that no one feels safe. Danni tells Gina that she's worried. She and Francelina have pulled the same weights and now she will have a 2 lb advantage. Michael starts to wonder if they should have eliminated Gina last week.

Follow up
Lisa is STUNNING in a beautiful bright blue dress. She has now lost 79 lbs and her husband has lost over 60 lbs. Dreams do come true.

Check in with the Kids

Jillian signed Sunny up for a Bollywood class. Can you say JEALOUS????  Sunny has always wanted to dance Bollywood style, but she's always been embarrassed.

Bob asks Biingo how his foot is doing. He's been in a boot for 6 out of the 7 weeks they have been working together. He tells Biingo that when he is better he will get a tryout for a baseball team.

Dolvett tells Lindsay that she will be an honorary member of the high school cheeleading team. "Keep working hard and your dreams will come true."

Back on the Ranch

The trainers hear about the temptation challenge and Jillian is Pissed that Alex ate.

The trainers pick who they are going to work out with:

Dolvett: Michael and Gina
Jillian: Alex, Francelina, and Jeff "If you play you have to pay"
Bob: Danni, Jackson, and Joe

Jillian and Jeff start bickering again. Jeff observes that whatever she sees in him she thinks that he needs to fix it in order to win. Then they sit down and finally talk. Jeff admits that his dad died when he was 17 and he never cried. He thought it was his job to take care of the family. His father found out on Christmas Eve that he had bone cancer and six weeks later he passed away.  Jillian says that he needs to change the way he responds to events.

Back with the Kids

Sunny is enjoying class.
Lindsay is practicing with the cheerleaders.
Biingo is depressed over his boot. It's holding him back.

Sunny is feeling lost and struggles in class, but she sticks with it and has fun.
Lindsay is put front and center and is scared, but she has fun.
Biingo gets the boot off!

Team Challenge

The winner gets a visit from 1 family member on the Ranch for 24 hours. And they get to pick one other person to get a visit from a family member.

The challenge is in a stadium. The spotlight will shine somewhere in the stadium and they must run to it. The last person into the light is eliminated. When it is down to 3 people then the first person to the light wins.

The eliminations go: Gina, Jackson, Mike, and Alex. Then it is Joe, Danni, and Francelina in the finals. Danni wins and gives the other family visit to Gina. But, then she gives her own to Michael.

Gina is nervous about her husband coming. She says it's like being on a first date.  Michael's wife brings their son. She says that she's never seen him this small.

Gina and her husband go on a picnic and she tells him that she needs to love her self. He is so cute and brings her wedding ring for her. She hasn't been able to wear it two years. She was 140 lbs when they got married five years ago. Since then she'd gained 100 lbs.

Dolvett goes for a walk with Michael and his wife. He asked her how she felt about his previous weight. She says that "Unfortunately she never verbalized that she was scared." Dolvett tells her that she needs to take this journey with Michael.

America's Challenge

Former BL winner Oliva and her husband make it a point to have a healthy and active date once a week.  For this date they are taking trapeze classes.

*For the Month of February Walgreens is offering free blood pressure tests*

Last Chance Workout

Bob is mad at Alex. He says that "Now is the time! What you are showing me is not much."

Weigh In

Francelina started at 217 lbs and now weighs 213 lbs for a total for 4 lbs with a 2 lb advantage - 2.76%
Alex started at 204 lbs and now weighs 198 lbs for a total of 6 lbs with a 2 lb advantage - 3.92%
She's pretty happy to be in One-derland
Danni started at 207 lbs and now weighs 201 lbs for a total of 6 lbs - 2.90%
Joe started at 291 lbs and now weighs 279 lbs for a total of 12 lbs - 4.12%
Jeff started at 323 lbs and now weighs 312 lbs for a total of 11 lbs - 3.41%
Gina started at 193 lbs and now weighs 184 lbs for a total of 9 lbs - 4.66%
Jackson started at 279 lbs and now weighs 266 lbs for a total of 13 lbs - 4.66%
Bob said that in all of the years on the show not too many people have surprised him, but Jackson did. He's got a little athlete in him.
Michael needs to lose over 10 pounds to stay safe. If not then Danni is safe.
Michael started at 363 lbs and now weighs 353 lbs for a total of 10 lbs.

It's Michael vs. Francelina

How the votes went down:
Danni voted for Michael
Alex voted for Francelina
Gina voted for Michael
Jeff voted for Michael

Michael is shocked that he's going home. He thought that the Blue team would have his back.

Jeff says that he did it for himself. He's finally putting himself first.

Michael says that the old Michael was slowly committing suicide with his eating.


Michael started the Biggest loser at 444 lbs. He now weighs 320 lbs. He lost 124 lbs and looks amazing!  He has his whole family going to Planet Fitness together. He also wanted to recommit to his family so he and his wife have a recommitment ceremony.

Next week
If they lose 70lbs as a group no one will be elminated

Have a Blessed Night.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.