Thursday, January 31, 2013

Yoga: It does a body good

Hello my Lovelies and Gents,

Well today was the start of Yoga day at work. HOLLA!  Oh how I have missed it. I woke up like it was Christmas. I was practically skipping to the shower.

So I'm such a yoga lover that I am on the group list to go set up the room before class. So I went to change and then walked over there. The set up took 10 minutes so I could go back to my desk and work for another 15 minutes. So here I am walking around the office in my lime green t-shirt, tight black yoga pants, and flip flops. OH fun! 

While I was getting dressed for class I was thinking about something. Last year my job was super stressful on me. I couldn't breathe and relax all day. So yoga at lunch was more of a stress reliever for me.  This time around my new position is less stressful. Sure I have stress in my life, but I am a lot more relaxed. No, this time it's about the stretching for.

That's right, this past year I beat the tar out of my body. The TAR I tell you!

Don't get me wrong, I still enjoy the "relaxing" part of it.  Although I do need to work on that. I was starting to think I would need a mouth guard. My jaw would get so tight while I was trying to "breathe" and hold a pose.  Bah! This would be so much easier if I was more flexible.

The relaxing part just is not my focus. My body is tight!  Okay, not "18-yr-old hard body on Miami beach tight".  It's "a day long massage probably wouldn't even do the trick" tight.  And this is a problem.  If my muscles are tight it means I don't get the range of motion I should have. It limits me. BAH!  So even though I am working out and have lost the weight, I'm still limited. But, this I can fix. I think it's time to up the yoga to twice a week and cut back on the weights for a little while.

Today's class was rough. Every pose that we had to hold for long periods of time had me shaking. My range of flexibility SUCKED!  Think of it like rubber bands. Your muscles should be like the long stretchy ones. Mine are like the fat short ones. Try as you might, you just can't pull it nearly as much.

This afternoon was good and bad. I was relaxed, but man my hips are sore. I know I don't stretch them or move them as much as I should.  Maybe I should get back in to belly dancing. Thank goodness for yoga, but oh how old it makes me feel.

So tonight I went to the gym. My body was feeling nice and loose by then. I did not want to reverse the hard work I put in today. So I just did 30 minutes on the treadmill. I was going to get a massage too, but I had reports of snow at home so I just left after that. That just means I get to get a massage on Friday night. Woo woo.


Before I go I have a couple things to mention.

First, I am halfway to my Autism Fundraising goal. YEAH! Thank you so much for all of your support.  Only $300 to go!

Second, I forgot to thank my grandmom for lending me the casserole dish to bring the egg scramble in yesterday. That was a huge help!  Grandmom reads this every day so "Thank you Grandmom! Love you!"

Have a Blessed Night my friends.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

I'm now on instagram: Jennie5973

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

It's Random Wednesday Y'all!

Happy Random Wednesday Y'all!

So last night when I got to the gym the parking lot was packed. PACKED. I drove around the building once and the closest spot I found was halfway around the back (for safety I don't like to park back there). I thought I saw a spot in front of me towards the front of the building, but off to the side. It turned out not to be a spot. I couldn't back up because I had a car on my butt so I drove around again to get the a spot close to it. In the mean time, I watched a car circle the parking lot 4 times (that I know of) looking for a closer spot. He did not want to walk that far...oh the irony.  Now I'll admit that when it's cold I feel that way too, but it was nice and warm last night.


So I am currently listening to a book on cd during my commute. My book club is reading the 2nd book in this series later in the year and I tried to read this first book a couple of years ago. I could not get into it.  I figured listening would make it easier. I was right. I am now addicted. Have you read: The No. 1 Ladies Detective Agency series?  Well now I'm all excited to read the next one...and the next....

The main character is Precious Ramotswe and the story takes place in Africa. She is described as "fat".  It's kind of interesting. The men find her desireable and say "the fatter the better". But there are women, particularly clothing salespeople, that make snide remarks about her weight.

So while I wish the main character lead a healthy eating lifestyle, I am quite happy that she has many admirers regarding her weight...and of course it made me wish I was in Africa during my fatter years.


Recently overheard at the gym: Someone made a comment to someone else that they were surprised that they remembered where the gym was. It was not made in a light joking tone. Even still, there's no room for joking like that as far as I am concerned. No one is better than anyone else. I cannot stand that kind of attitude in the gym. I would totally revoke that membership if I could.

Anyone who is coming to the gym, either for the first time or returning after a while, should never be made to feel like they aren't welcome. High school was bad enough. Grow up people!  And to you, dear person, welcome back. I'm glad you are here!  Even if I don't know you.

It's a sad day. :-(  Tonight I retired one of my favorite pairs of sneakers. I wore them for the Philly Half Marathon in September and well quite frankly they are beat now. So they are retired for casual wear now.

The good news is that I will be by the outlets this weekend for Polar Plunge and that is the perfect time to hit up the Reebok outlet for a new pair. I have 6 weeks to break them in before the DC Half Marathon.


This morning it was my turn to bring breakfast in for the Breakfast group at work. Half of the time it's bagels.  I wanted to do something different.  I found a Mexican Egg Scramble recipe that I fell in love with. It's egg whites, black beans, cheese, and salsa.  I did a test run and it was good. But, my test run was not for 15 people. I rinsed the beans off, but I put them in a little earlier than I should have. They turned my eggs a slight shade of gray.  I was worried enough that my "healthy" breakfast would not be received well, but now I was bringing them gray eggs. UGH.  Luckily I had a whole 60 minutes to think about that on the car ride in.

The good news is that those who tried it loved it. I still had some left over, but in all fairness, I made more than was necessary. It's hard to figure out how much egg whites to use. In case you want to try it:

Mexican Egg Scramble

Makes: 1 servings


  • 3 egg whites
  • 1/4 cup canned black beans
  • 1 ounce reduced-fat cheddar cheese
  • 2 tablespoons salsa


1. Scramble 3 egg whites with 1/4 cup canned black beans (rinsed and drained) and 1 ounce reduced-fat cheddar cheese. Top with 2 tablespoons salsa, or to taste.


While I am driving to the gym I like to station surf to see if I can find any songs to add to my playlist. Sometimes I hear a song that I immediately want to add, but then I think about it. If it makes me dance that is not a good thing. I can download it for a fun playlist, but not a running playlist. If it makes me dance I tend to slow down and move the upper body instead of focusing on the task at hand.

Last night I heart "Apache" by  Sugar Hill Gang. Go ahead, I dare you not to dance!


So tonight was a rough night for me. Last night I ran 4 miles. I felt good last night. That meant that today my knees would be sore. Add that to the rain today and I felt like my knees were about 90 years old.

My brain was all over the place trying to decide what workout to do. No running. And I didn't really want to do weights since I have yoga tomorrow. And honestly, it took a lot go get me to the gym tonight. Not even the thought of Gym Crush Big Dude was enticing. I went though. I put in 30 minutes on the treadmill walking and then worked on abs. I'm still trying to decide what to do tomorrow night. I don't want to counteract the work yoga will do for me.


Have a Blessed Night.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Biggest Loser Season 14 - Episode 5

It's Biggest Loser Time!

We start the episode shortly after Pam has been eliminated. Danni is distraught. Pam made their workouts feel like she wasn't alone. She then confessed that her Big fear is living along. This week she will be forced to confront that. Well except that she won't be'll be her and Jillian.

After their first workout they all walk in to the kitchen. They are reminded everyday that the Weigh-ins are won just as much in the kitchen then they are in the gym.

The problem: There is no food in the kitchen!  There is instead, a note from Allison asking them to meet her at the grocery store.  Big Mike was funny. "We've got ten overweight people here. You don't mess with our food."

This week's episode is: Healthy on a Budget.

Most people associate Healthy Eating with being too expensive. So they are going to be limited to a budget of $10 a day. And they have 15 minutes to do it.

Gina:  "I think it's 100% cheaper to eat unhealthy."

Joe:  "I usually shop per day not planning ahead."

Alex: "I don't grocery shop. I'm a fast food junkie."

Lisa: "My kids are athletes. I don't know how to feed them. We have brinner (breakfast/dinner) a lot."

Danni was checking out the Greek yogurt. She checked the labels and found one that is 20 calories less than what she usually gets.

Jackson was stressing to make sure they had snacks in addition to meals.

Gina admitted that she doesn't really go grocery shopping. This taught her where to shop. "You don't need to come in off the outside aisles."

At the Register:

The Red team was $4 under.

The Blue team strategy was to buy what people regularly ate at the ranch. They were $1 under.

The White team (Danni) was $9 under.  "You need to look at what you're putting in to your body."

The Full Grocery lists are available on

Back at the Ranch:

The bartering began in the kitchen. Some teams forgot items while other teams had more than enough. Gina was particularly worried about the lack of food.

There was a little bit of game play going. The Blue team is worried. They have not lost a weigh in yet.  David said "This is ours to lose."  He and Gina are worried about being eliminated based on age and injury.

Back in the Gym:

I love the Red team workouts. Dolvett is yelling "This is where the pain meets the pain!" Jackson says that Dolvett always reminds them that they are targets.

The Blue team has not lost this season.  Bob lets them know that they are set up to fail this week. So their level of INTENSITY has to go up!  Jeff's response was "Today we have a new trainer, his name is Drill Sargant Bob."

Alex is working out with the White team.  She tells Jillian that she doesn't know what's happening. She is giving her best, her best is not good enough.  Then she talks about how her weight is affecting her love life. "How can I love someone if I can't love myself".

Makeovers for Contestants who went home:

Nikki has lost 50 plus pounds and wants to do another 50. She hasn't been this weight since she was a freshman in high school. Biggest Loser changed her life. *I am not sure how she is allowed to be shown now. She walked off of the show. Previous contestants who did that were not shown again. I am wondering if it's because Jillian gave her the "options"*

TC  has learned how bad he wanted it for himself.  It's funny that it only took 1 week for a transformation. Looking forward to life. He has now lost 80 lbs.

Back on the Ranch:

Bob asks Alex what's going on.  Her response: "Nothing."  Bob tells her that's not true and that her team needs her. Finally she blurts out: "I'm up and alone out her running in the morning and I only lose 4 lbs. And it pisses me off" Bob tells her that's good.  Now it's time to change. "WIN IT.  Fight like you have never fought before."

Cut to time with Lisa: "You don't want to waste a moment. You have to do things that you don't want to do, but I do it. My husband has never known me under 200 lbs."

Jillian says that it's "week 5 and everyone has gone home. I can't go after Danni. There is no yelling at her. She falls to pieces."  To which Danni responds "It's different to see the softer side of Jillian."

Time to check in with the Kids:

Lindsay joined gymnastics center. She is in training to join the cheer leading team next year when she get to high school.
Sunny's goal is to fit in a pretty prom dress.
Bingo says it's hard to be motivated running with boot.  That it's "de-motivating me." Bob is worried and tells him"Get outside and play baseball with friends."
Dolvett tells Lindsay "We gotta get a workout in!" So he gets her active: stand up, sit down, floor ladder. "That was my test. I'm proud of you" It's all about finding out what these kids have a passion for.
Jillian has Sunny jog in place. Heels to butt.
Sunny: " I imagine myself in that dress. and it's not how I look in it, it's how I feel. I radiate."

Nutrition Time:

Devin Alexander is the Biggest Loser Chef. She comes in to talk to them about taste. Many people think that to eat healthy you are giving up taste. The dish she is about to show them serves 4 people for under $20.

Southwest loaded sweet potato - salsa, chicken, green salsa. greek yogurt.  All for only 342 calories

Team Challenge:

Allison asks the teams how they are doing. Gina mentions that she is worried about the lack of food. She mentions that they didn't get enough fish. Jeff rolls his eyes. He says she plays the victim and that everyone had a voice about what food to get and she never spoke up.

Every member of the winning team gets 10 memberships to Planet Fitness and they also get the choice of a 2 lb advantage or....duh duh duh...a chance to call home.

Each team has a fountain. The object is to fill each fountain with coins. There are 10 coins for each person and each coin weigh 5lbs.

At the halfway point the Red team is neck and neck with Danni.  It is very close at the end, but Danni wins.  She admits that she was a swimmer 8 years ago, but wasn't sure if she would be able to keep up that pace.

Jackson: "Please pick the phone call. Your mom misses you"

Danni picks the 2 lbs.

Back on the Ranch: 

Bob takes David to see Dr. H about his injury.  They go over the results of the MRI. There is fat on side of knee and his bones are spongey with little cracks. David admits to inuring his knee on treadmill before. Bob is upset: "I wish I had known about this."

He's doing a great job working through his physical issues. needs to deal with emotional issues. So then we get a little back story on David. He has a wife and 7 children. *And let me just say that in this video I can totally see a huge weight loss now* His youngest daughter, Tiffany, has Rett Syndrome. She can walk, but not well. Someone needs to be with her at all times. Mentally she is between 12-18 months. He's worried that his weight will keep him from taking care of her.

Bob lets him know that it's okay to ask for help.

Challenge America:

Devin Bay High School in Cleveland. Devin Alexander shows up and shows them how to make a  Piled High Supreme Breakfast Pizza. Prep the tomatoes, basil, and garlic. Can be prepped the day before. Cook the Jennie-O turkey sausage and bacon. Put the pre-cooked eggs on top and put in the oven just long enough for cheese to melt.

*they didn't say what to use as crust

Back on the Ranch: 

Jillian is superstitious:  If you win the challenge you lose the weigh-in.  So she shakes it up for Danni and has her boxing.

Last Chance Workout:

The Red team really pushed hard.

The Blue team seemed very solomn at first. Then Bob started shouting. "Sweat's the name of the game today! You need to feel like you are dying through every part of your workout".  And then of course they had to show Big Mike puking on the bike. Ewww.

Weigh In:

 Red team.
*Joe started at 310 lbs and now weighs 299 lbs for a total of 11 lbs
   -wants to break 300
   -Dolvett says that his nickname is Pause (always wants to take a break)
*Francelina started at 231 lbs and now weighs 224 lbs for a total of 7 lbs
*Jackson started at 288 lbs and now weighs 280 lbs for a total of 8 lbs
*Lisa started at 214 lbs and now weighs 209 lbs for a total of 5 lbs.
Team Total: 31 lbs and 2.97 %

Blue team needs more than 41 lbs
*Gina started at 206 lbs and now weighs 197 lbs for a total of  9 lbs
   - Bob "You're in One-derland!"
*Big Mike started at 384 lbs and now weighs 371 lbs for a total of 13 lbs
*Jeff started at 342 lbs and now weighs 329 lbs for a total of 13 lbs
   -"I'm loving the person that I'm growing in to."
*David started at 263 lbs and now weighs 253 lbs for a total of 10 lbs
   -Blue team is safe
*Alex started at 217 lbs and now weighs 207 for a total of 10 lbs
   -Bob hugged her after and told her "Your best was MORE than enough."
Team Total: 55 lbs and 3.9%

White needs to lose more than 4 lbs
*Danni started at 222 lbs and now weighs 213 lbs for a total of 9 lbs
   -Jillian "YOU did it! Not because I made you."
Team Total: 11 lbs and 4.95%

Alex is Biggest loser of the week.

The Red team lost. They will head to elimination, but cannot vote for Joe who lost the highest percentage this week.  Jackson goes first and says it's hard. He has to choose between his best friend and his motivator.  When asked who he voted for he said that the wording on the screen was horrible. "Who do you want to be eliminated?"

Jackson voted for Lisa.
Lisa voted for Jackson.
Francelina voted for Lisa.
Joe voted for Lisa.


Lisa seemed okay with this. She was happy they they all voted for her because she has the strength to succeeeed at home. She said that she has a family that is behind her 120%.

Lisa Today:

She started on the Biggest Loser Ranch at 246 lbs and now weighs 170 lbs. She has lost 76 lbs and LOOKS AMAZING!!!

As a Special Education teacher she has noticed that a lot of her students struggle with their weight. So they are now cooking healthier foods and being active in class.

Next Week:

Laila Ali comes to train them in boxing.
There is a Roll of the Dice - Whoever it lands on will be the only person on the team whose weight counts.

Have a Blessed Night my friends.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

I'm now on instagram: Jennie5973

Monday, January 28, 2013

My Lifetime Movie Network Day

Happy Monday Bleeps!

So this morning when I woke up the forecast on the news was for an afternoon wintery mix and freezing rain. It was already snowing. After my two long long long weather related commutes last week I decided to work from home. 

Actually, it worked out for me. I went to bed last night alternating the heating pad and the massager on my shoulder and lower back. I looked super cute and not at all sad.  A day sitting in bed sounded really good.

The problem is that I wasn't moving around as much as I should. I drank water like crazy, but I think I am dehydrated. My fingers are swollen and I have not needed the ladies room nearly as much as I should have.I have gotten in my 8 cups of 8 oz of water.  I feel like a camel. Where is it going if it ain't coming out?

Not having anyone to talk to all day I turned to Lifetime.  Well the Lifetime Movie Network to be precise. There wasn't anything on that I wanted to watch on the other channels. That's when I found Calendar Girls on LMN. Oh how I love this movie and Ms. Helen Mirren. I haven't seen it in forever.

It's based on the true story of some ladies a little later on in life (although not much later than me now...bah) who pose for a calendar to raise money to buy a couch  for the Leukemia ward at the hospital where one of the ladies lost her husband. The kicker is that they are going to be nude in the pictures. There will be objects placed in front of the delicacies, but they are still showing their bodies. And all I'm thinking when I watch this is that forget when I am their age. I would like their bodies now!  Who knows. When I reach my goal maybe I will put out one of those calendars to raise money. haha.

As soon as that movie was over, a movie I had never seen came on.  It was called Lying to Be Perfect.  The previews were of 3 larger ladies who make a pact to lose weight. It starred Poppy Montgomery, who is stunning and skinny. That means fat suits.

I was not planning on watching, but I was too lazy to grab the remote.  And then I was truly outraged at the beginning. She works for a magazine surrounded by the skinny beautiful people. She however, is heavier...and might I add sloppy. Why do they always have to portray heavier people as messy and unkempt?

In the beginning this tiny little thing is walking down the hall with a plate of donuts for a meeting. In the meeting someone pushes the plate towards her and within seconds she is shoving a powdered donut down her throat and getting powder all over herself.

Her character, Nola, wants to be a writer, not an editor, but she is told that she is not a "face" of the magazine.  So she makes up a persona to answer letters and soon her column is saving the magazine and they are going to print a book.

She has two other larger friends and they decide to start a pact together, a Cinderella Pact. They will diet and exercise together. I was sad when the one friend said that her family always goes away for vacation and her kids don't choose the beach because she won't be comfortable in a bathing suit. She just wants to be with her family doing normal family things. I hear ya sister!

So they come up with a plan.  They will workout together. They will get rid of their secret stashes.  They will have weekly weigh-ins.  And what I liked best is that they will each choose a symbol. One chooses the color red. She wears all dark clothes and wants something bright. And one chooses a bikini. Nola doesn't pick one.

Of course there is a love story.  Nola accidentally bumps into a guy and blah blah blah he asks her if she wants to join him for a drink.  While they are out his crazy ex-girlfriend comes in.  "You broke up with me so you could date this fat lady?" CRINGE!  He says they are over and she responds "It's not over until she sings." Okay so I cheered when Nola punched her.

So throughout the course of the movie the girls are losing weight. While the other girls are embracing their new bodies, Nola is still dressing a little dowdy. Now I know this has to do with the big reveal at the end of the movie, but argh. One of the friends tells her that it's time to find clothes that fit. They will not be "back of the closet girls anymore."

I won't ruin the movie in case you want to watch it.  I will say I was still very annoyed at the beginning, but I was really happy with some of the messages that came out throughout the movie. Just kind of sucks that it was a beautiful skinny actress in a fat suit that starred in it. Although I know it's unrealistic to expect someone to lose the weight during filming.   Anyway, that was my day.

So sadly I am missing my Book Club meeting tonight.  But, the good news is that I will be able to watch The Biggest Loser. HOLLA!

Have a Blessed Night.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Sunday, January 27, 2013

My Weekend: Crossfit, Studying, Grandmom's, and Yoga

Hello My Lovelies and Gents,

Did you have a good weekend?  Are you keeping warm?

Well I got my workout in Friday night and I was happy to find out that Crossfit changed to 10am on Saturday. Woo Woo!  I got an extra hour of sleep. HOLLA!

So this class was oh so fun. Haha. Wall walks and Kettle Bell Swings. The wall walks had me excited and nervous.  I am that much closer to my hand stand push ups. The problem is that I knew that when my legs started walking up the wall my shirt would start falling towards my head. OH and gravity would be pulling the fat in my belly and boobs down towards my face. Oh joy. Seriously, I was mentally blocked during these. It sucked. All I was thinking is "Everyone can see the fat!"

I was 10 swings short of 4 full rounds at the end of 15 minutes. I finished them before I started my stretching. There was no way I was going to be that close and not finish.

I came home and made some egg whites with spinach and herb seasoning. YUM. That was good. And then I was off to study. I went to Starbucks and used my free drink on a venti white chocolate mocha with Raspberry. Crossfit is a great way to start the day, but I'm ready for a nap an hour after. I was going to need some caffeine if I was going to get any studying done. And the chapter I was working on was Emergency Procedures.  You know, real fun stuff.

After studying I was going to be going to dinner at Grandmom's.  My aunt and cousins were going to be coming and I hadn't seen them since October. Luckily they were running late, so I was able to stay and finish my chapter.

Before I could go to Grandmom's I had to stop at the store. She needed some artichokes for a spinach and artichoke dip. She also needed some whip cream for dessert. I, of course, got a fat-free whipped cream.

So here's the problem. I was starving, dinner wasn't ready, and they wouldn't be there for at least another hour. I burned a lot of calories in the morning. I could eat the fridge!  So my plan was to help clean up after dinner. If I was involved in the remaining preparations, there would be no food for anyone else.

Once everyone arrived there was a mad dash to set the table and get the food out. Cousin Hannah and I practically had a throw down over the biscuits. It was not pretty. I am happy to report that they all made it to the table before we ate any though. I snacked on the dip, but I did not go overboard.

When we sat down the first thing I did was put the salad on my plate. I finished the salad before putting anymore food on the plate...well except for the biscuit. But, I didn't touch it until after the salad. After the salad I had some roasted chicken, green beans, and parsley potatoes (not too many though).   I was still hungry after, so I finished off the green beans and had one more biscuit. I was full after that. So I immediately got up and took my plate to the kitchen. Even though we were still sitting there eating, I needed to get rid of the plate. Otherwise I would eat more. And let's face it, there was dessert to be had later.

When Hannah walked in earlier in the night, the first thing I noticed were her fabulous boots. FABULOUS.  They were brown leather knee high boots. I wanted to try them on so bad, but I as nervous. My calves do not always fit in leather boots. I went for it anyway. I unzipped them and put my foot in. I couldn't zip it. I almost cried. Then my aunt tried them on. She has calves too and was able to get him on. BAH!  So I zipped them and tried just putting my feet down in. THEY FIT! YEAH!  Oh I want them. They are the Madden Girl - Zerge if you want to get them for me. LOL. I would like them in a 7.5 Cognac thank you.

I don't remember the context of the conversation, but I believe at one point I made a comment to my Uncle, who had also stopped over, about "try not to be jealous of my scoliosis."  My Aunt is currently going to school to be a Physicians Assistant. "You have scoliosis. Let me see!" What do you want me to do? Drop my pants so that you can see my uneven butt?  She had me bend over and ran her hand up and down my spine. Yep, I have it. It's not bad enough to need a brace though. I am really trying hard to cut back the heavy bags on my right shoulder, but it's not easy after a lifetime of doing it.

After I tried on the boots I went in to wash the dishes. Grandmom was soo cute. She came in while I was washing and said "Oh you're such a good Cookie. Oops I didn't mean to use that word." haha.

Dessert was Angel Food cake with strawberries and fat-free whipped cream. Oh I love grandmom's Angel Food Cake. It's so light and tasty. I sooooo wanted a second piece, but I didn't have one. It was still a good night.

So this morning's plan was originally to go to church and then head straight to the old gym for a long distance run. It was a little hard to move this morning. My body is tired. TIRED. Tomorrow is a day of rest because I have Book Club. Today would be day 7 of workouts. I could take the day off or I could modify. I know my body and if I tried to force the treadmill on it, things would get ugly. So I decided that I would do yoga instead. I didn't get to do it this past week and we start up at work on Thursday. I would like to be a little more flexible before then.

I was going to do yoga before going to meet Bibble at Starbucks for some study time, but she went early and I decided to study first. So I went and knocked out the Legal Procedures chapter. UGH. I really don't want to get sued.  I stayed a little longer than planned and started  reading my new book. And Ick, I don't like it. ARGH!  It's a modern Pride & Prejudice.  I heart my Jane Austen and I like adaptations, but this one is not good. 

So I came home and started yoga. muscles are sore from Crossfit, but I didn't care. I really needed this. And O.M.G!  I am so not flexible right now. Just imagine how much better my workouts will be when my muscles can actually flex the way they are supposed to.  Hopefully between my hydro massages, stretching, and yoga I can get there soon.

Alright so I'm a superstitious person.  Especially when it comes to sports. Well my toe nails have been purple for the Ravens Super Bowl run. We have one more week to go before the game and that nail polish is NOT coming off!  But, oh goodness I needed to take care of my feet. I could have probably sliced cheese with my toe nails and my callouses were so bad I could use my feet as sand paper. So I soaked them and gave myself a non-nail polish changing pedicure...OH I needed that!
Have a Blessed Night my friends.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

I'm now on instagram: Jennie5973

Friday, January 25, 2013

Those aren't my thighs!

Happy Friday Bleeps!

Okay so last night I was at the gym early. I wasn't able to take a lunch so I left work at 4. I had originally thought it would be a good night for Crossfit, but they were going to be doing Front Squats and that really hurt my injured ankle. Instead I went to the gym to get in a long distance walk/run.

It was so nice to get there while it was light out. I had my sunglasses on. YEAH!  Hooray for the sun!  It threw me off though. I got on a treadmill by the ESPN/ESPN2 tvs and was happy.  Until it got dark out. I was in front of the windows, not the mirror.

I don't like the treadmills in front of the mirror because I see my problem area while I am running. I see my head and the dreaded belly.  Most of the time I can't really see my full reflection in the window if there is someone on the elliptical in front of me. And maybe I haven't really been looking at myself in the reflection lately, but last night practically brought me to tears. It was two hours of torture.

I was wearing a lime green t-shirt and fitted black pants. My reflection in the mirror was so distorted it was awful. It looked like my hips were about a foot lower than they actually are and that my thighs were ginormous. This wasn't my body, but this is what I was seeing. It really messed with my head. It hurt. It's all I could look at and it was upsetting.  What was really upsetting was that I was looking at everyone around me and their reflections were normal. Do I have beer goggles when I look at my body?

I couldn't even be fully distracted by Gym Crush Big Dude. He was off to the side and that made it worse. "Oh my gosh, is this how he sees me?" TOTALLY crazy!  This was the reflection in the window. He's looking right at me not the warped reflection.   He still smiled at me and I smiled back, but I was done for the night. There would be no flirty flirty moments. That stupid reflection got in to my head.

After the treadmill, Gym Buddy Lisa and I went back to stretch. We were almost finished when he came back and got on a machine right by us. Once again he looked over and we shared a smile. And then my head went "GUH he's just looking at your fat. You are sitting hunched over on the floor just squashing it all together."  I hate my head some times.

We both ended up at the trash can getting paper towels to wipe down our equipment. Standing that close to him made me feel tiny like Thumbelina.  He looked like he was ready to say something. This was my big moment. I didn't take it. I walked away quickly.  I told myself it was because I was disgustingly sweaty, but really it's because my head had me convinced that I was huge.

I was so mad at myself. I know the windows are distorted.  I know that wasn't the shape of my body. I had all of these opportunities to talk to him, but all I could think of has big I was. It didn't seem to matter that he is always smiling at me. BAH!  I was determined to go talk to him tonight.

But, it was not meant to be...for the night at least. It started snowing in the afternoon and we left at 4:30 to get a head start. did everyone else...and the stop light was not working. It took me 30 minutes to get out of the parking lot.  And another hour before I made it to the gym (which is 9 miles away).  I decided to go to the gym because I would just be sitting in traffic anyway.  The good news is that parking was not a problem. The bad news is that he wasn't there to talk to tonight. Oh well, I consoled myself with a massage.

Have a Blessed Night.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Thursday, January 24, 2013

Polar Plunge Anxiety: Bikini and FRIGID Temperatures

Hello my Lovelies and Gents, put it bluntly, it's freaking cold outside!  Normally I wouldn't really care that much, but next weekend is the Polar Plunge.  I'm already starting to have anxiety over it and now there's more to worry about. Bah!

So you're probably asking yourself "What's the big deal Jennie?  You did this last year and you know what to expect. You signed up for it voluntarily dummy."  And you would be correct.

Before I go further, there is still time to make a pledge for the Polar Plunge. It benefits Delaware Special Olympics:

Even if you don't want to do the plunge and live in the area I would encourage you to come down for any part of the weekend. I guarantee you will smile the whole time. The hearts of these Special Olympians are so big and their smiles are infectious.

Okay, so last year's Polar Plunge Festival was one of the best things that I have ever been a part of. I enjoyed every second of the weekend. It was so much fun and Oh how happy everyone was.  There was no question that I wouldn't participate this year. None whatsoever.

And so when I put the pledge requests out there saying that I would take the plunge in a bikini if I met my amount I really wasn't thinking. I was sort of using it as my motivation to push myself working out and eating right.  It was supposed to jump start 2013 for me. 

For the most part it has worked. I have seen a big difference in my body since January 1. In fact, I believe I am smaller than I was in October. YEAH!  I have been increasing the cardio intensity, the abs, the weights, and Crossfit definitely helped.

It's hard because in your head you just want to do hours of ab work and that will solve the problem. That's not how it works though. You need the cardio to burn the fat and then the ab work to tighten it up. And that is my goal. I am under no illusion that I will lose the belly completely before the plunge. The goal right now it simply to minimize the jiggle. Cause oh yeah, Dummy here wasn't thinking.  I'm not going to be laying down in this bikini and letting my friend Gravity help out. I'm going to be running to and from the ocean. *insert OH FUDGE here*.  Did we learn nothing from last year's news video debacle?

For those of you who are new to the blog, during last year's plunge we were somehow situated right behind the news camera and got caught on camera as we were running up the hill after plunging in the ocean. Baywatch it was NOT!  My bathing suit was too big and my boobs were just out of control bouncing side to side. It was not attractive! AND IT WAS ON TV!

So this year is a little different than last year. Last year I did the 5K with pal Bibble and her daughter. Then Bibble and I did the plunge together the next day. This year I am doing the 5K on my own, but I signed up to do the plunge with a gentleman from work. He has a team every year and is one of the top fundraisers for the Plunge. He told me that they will decide early on Sunday where we will all meet for the plunge and take a group picture. I sure as heck hope this is BEFORE we take off our clothes.  I can't imagine the goosebumps that are going to happen on my bare belly.

Okay so I am looking at the weather and as cold as it is now, it should warm up by early next week. That's awesome in theory, but will that be long enough to warm up the ocean water? We sort of lucked out last year. It was cold, but not as cold as it was in past years. Last year the water was actually warmer than the air, although it didn't quite feel like it. This year, I fear, will not be that way. I have a sinking feeling that it will be frigid. BAH!

Right now the 10 day forecast has Saturday at 45 degrees. That's way better than the 20's that it is today, but it's still on the downslide of a high of 58 during the middle of the week. Unfortunately, that high also comes with showers so even the fake out of a sunny day will not really warm it up. Trying not to think about the fact that my nose has been running for the last day...really hoping this is storm pressure related and once the snow storm breaks tomorrow I will be okay.

Last year the adrenaline was pumping so much that I honestly didn't feel the cold until we were walking to the car. That's when my legs started to feel the numb. We eventually showered and got on the road to head back home to Philly.  This year I have taken that Monday off so that I can enjoy the Super Bowl before heading back the next day. I hope I can get a nap in there. Oh and the plan will be to hit Crossfit Monday night when I get back :-)

The irony is that all of the fat that I have lost would help keep me warm for the plunge, but that fat in a bathing suit kept me out of signing up for many many years.

Have a Blessed Night my friends.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

I'm now on instagram: Jennie5973

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

%#&%^ It's Cold! - Random Wednesday

Happy Random Wednesday Bleeps!

I hope you are keeping warm. Goodness it is COLD!

So the past couple of morning my water intake has been thrown off. Instead of drinking from the water bottle during my commute in to work I was nursing some tea and sugar free hot chocolate. But, I didn't even finish them so by 9am I realized that I was way off and began my water intake. I was a little behind, but managed to catch up by the end of the day.


I have sad news. Last night I learned that the Crossfit gym is closing. I am sooo sad. I was really liking it. I had been trying to figure out how I could budget in for more classes once the groupon classes were done. Now I am trying to figure out how to get my classes in before it closes.  I think I can get in a couple of weeknight classes.  Even thinking that's how I'll spend Valentine's Day night. lol. The next night is the last night.

In addition to figuring out how to get in my classes, I have to go back to figuring out what to do with my weekends for my workouts. The original plan was to get a membership to Longwood Gardens and go walk there for a couple of hours on Saturdays. I love that idea. I can make it my light day and just go extra hard at the gym during the week. I just have to keep from taking my camera every week and taking a bunch of pictures. I also need to get back in to going to the gym right after church. That has been reserved for grocery shopping lately. It still may be, I just need to plan things out.


Okay, so my confession is that I have hit up the box of Girl Scout Cookies. BAH!  Monday night's commute home was so stressful in the snow and ice that I just couldn't help myself. It's how I cope. If I didn't have anything like that I think I might have exploded. I'm like a caged animal pacing around sniffing for treats.


So last night was the sad news about Crossfit, but the good news is that we got the formal email about Yoga starting up next week at work. YEAH!  I even made the list to have the meeting request sent for my outlook calendar. So honored! lol.

Today Ms. Tracey and I went walking at the mall and ran in to Five Below at the end to pick up new yoga mats to leave at our desks. I didn't want to bring my nice one in every week. I'm keeping that one strictly for home use.  I had one that I kept at my desk from last time, but I gave it to my cousin.   We got matching lime green ones. We're so cool! 

But, for any of you near a Five Below they have a bunch of workout DVDs for $5. Check them out.

This weather is playing havoc with my workout schedule. Originally I was going to take tomorrow night off as my day of rest/and or yoga day. Gym Buddy Lisa has something to do so I would be on my own. But, now we are expecting snow on Friday. So there is a possibility that I would work from home on Friday and that would mean no gym. I could do crossfit, but I don't like Night/morning heavy workouts. One of those has to be light.  So now Friday is my night off.  Tomorrow night I will go to crossfit or the gym depending on what Coach Bryan posts as tomorrow's workout.

I finally talked to the IT Department. The bag I have been using for my laptop was not meant to hold laptops. I had given my original backpack to Ms. Kerri when she got her laptop because I had switched to the smaller cuter purple laptop bag that I had. Well that broke a couple weeks ago and I've been using a carrier bag since. That doesn't have the support in the strap that the laptop backpacks have. So let's hope this helps with the shoulder problem.
Well I did it again. I wore my red coat with my red corduroy pants. To make it worse, I wasn't thinking when I got dressed this morning. The sneakers that I keep in my locker to wear for walking at lunch are bright blue. I looked silly walking today. Don't care though because I could not stop looking at the reflection of my skinny legs in all of the store windows. Luckily I couldn't see my feet.

Okay, I need to say something that I was thinking during Biggest Loser. On Monday night's episode the trainers went to visit the kids. Lindsay had quit cheerleading because the girls made comments about her weight. Dolvett doesn't like bullies, but he also said to tackle problems head on. So he brought out the cheerleading team from school and they worked together.

I REALLY hope these are different girls.  I CRINGED when he did this. I don't know these girls at all and I am not assuming that they are going to be mean, but teenage girls can be very hurtful and I really hope this wasn't a "Be nice so that we can be on TV" moment.  I do not want to see this girl hurt again.


So do you remember how I talked about "It's Complicated" before?  I love that movie, but I have such powerful food associations with it that I had to get rid of it. Well I did the same with Mystic Pizza. I love that movie!  I really do. But, I cannot keep movies that have food as an additional character in them on my shelf. I am not that disciplined yet.  Luckily my mom has my copy of Julie & Julia. That movie is practically like porn to me. haha. I just heart Julia Child's story so much that we can't get rid of that...and hello!  Julie got a book deal from her blog...come on agents. Somebody discover me!

I had some requests for the Chicken Jambalaya recipe on my facebook page so I thought I would share it with you also:

Chicken Jambalaya

Makes: 6 servings


·         8 ounces skinless, boneless chicken-breast halves

·         16 ounce package frozen bell peppers and onions

·         8 ounces smoked turkey sausage, halved lengthwise and cut into 1/2-inch slices

·         2 cups water

·         1 14 1/2 ounce can diced tomatoes with jalapeno peppers, undrained

·         8 ounce package jambalaya rice mix


1. Cut chicken into 1/2-inch strips. Place frozen vegetables in a 3-1/2- or 4-quart slow cooker and top with chicken strips and turkey sausage. Add water, undrained tomatoes, and seasoning packet from rice. Cover and cook on low-heat setting for 5 to 6 hours or on high-heat setting for 2 1/2 to 3 hours. Stir in rice. Cover and cook about 45 minutes more (if using low-heat setting, turn to high-heat setting), or until most of the liquid is absorbed and the rice is tender.

Sending a shout out to my Daddy. For no special reason. Just because I love him.

Have a Blessed Night.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

The Biggest Loser - Season 14 Episode 4

Before I get started, let me start with a disclosure. It started snowing while I was in the gym last night and the roads were a mess.  It took me an hour to get home and I walked in 5 minutes before The Biggest Loser started. So I missed a little preparing dinner and my lunch. Sorry.

There was hardly any time to breathe. Just as the red team walked into the house and explained how the Elimination went, Allison walked in with all 3 trainers. She told them that 3 more people would be leaving the Ranch....cue the dramatic music....Fear not, it's just the trainers. They would be traveling to spend the week with the kids.  This means that the teams are on their own.

I missed Bob's talk with his team.  When I walked in Dolvett was telling the Red team that they need to be Warriers. They need to get angry. No more fun! They coasted the first two weeks and lost the weigh in last week.

Jillian sat and gave her girls detailed instructions.  She didn't think Pam would be happy, but she wanted her to do 5 miles a day. Five minutes on and one minute off. She can do it!

Now it's time for the kids.

Dolvett surprises Lindsay in school.

Bob surprises Biingo (sorry, I've been spelling it wrong) at dinner.

Jillian surprises Sunny while she was studying with her friends.

Bob and Biingo:

The first thing Bob notices is that that Biingo's mom looks great. She tells him that she has lost 27lbs just by eating right and exercising. Bob has always said that "It starts with the Parents."  Our kids need to get moving again. 

Sadly Biingo's dad lost his job when the recession started. They were forced to sell their house.  They were fortunate enough to have his brother offer to set up his basement for them.  They have been in this apartment style basement for a year and a half. Biingo's mom said that she think the stress of the move and changing schools was hard on him. That's when he really started to gain the weight.

Bob immediately checks the fridge since Dr. Joanna was there and threw out the junk last week. He wanted to see how they were doing. Everything looked good. The junk was still gone. Good job!  And the even better news is that they don't eat out any longer.  His mom said "We were supposed to be the Gatekeepers and we failed. This is about a lifestyle change." LOVE her!

Bob tells Biingo that he has a surprise for him....but we cut to a commercial.

Back at the Ranch:

Jackson is stepping up "Whether he's(Dolvett) here or not we should be working hard."

*This is when I fixed my dinner and missed a little *

Jillian and Sunny:

Sunny is stressed. She is busy preparing for college.  Jillian commented that lots of people are stressed and busy yet manage to maintain a helathy lifestyle so there must be more to the situation. Sunny then confesses that she feels like she has been pushed in to a role. She was pushed in to the stereotypical smart Indian girl role and she's afraid of failing.  Jillian tells her that it's time to find her passion. Then she asks Sunny if she is comfortable talking to her mom about this. She's scared.

Dolvett and Lindsay:

Dolvett and Lindsay go back to her house and talks to her family. They are working out together. Every morning at 5am Lindsay and her mom go out for a 2 mile walk/run. Then in the afternoon she bikes with her sister.

Then Dolvett wants to have a one on one with Lindsay. He wants to talk about her Cheerleading experience.  She couldn't focus in her life because of the teasing.  Dolvett says that he has no tolerance for bullies.  You can't hide from your problems, you must face them head on.  So he takes Lindsday to the school gym and the cheerleaders come out.  They are cheering: Never give up.  Always fight for your dreams.   And together they all workout together.

Lindsay sits down with two of the girls and they tell her that there is nothing she can't do. That they are cheering for her and to push through the pain because it is so worth it.

Back on the Ranch...It's Challenge Time!

The teams are walking up to the challenge along the beach. Jackson comments "I see the ocean. Half of our team can't swim.  I hope it's not a water challenge."  It's not.

They are going to run a 5K.

Jeff said that he had only ever run to be first in the buffett line.

Okay, so the bonus is that after the 5K $7500 will be donated to the Boys and Girls club.  Plus the winning team will split $7500. Second will split $5000. Third will split $2500.

Early on Alex developed a blister on her foot. It slowed her down, but she didn't give up. Danni took an early lead. She knew she was in the lead because she never saw anyone passing her. Francelina was talking about how hot it was, but she "just has to keep going."  Jackson was having a hard time breathing.  Dr. H. joined him. He paced him and gave him an inhaler and soon he was feeling much better.

Naturally they were dramatic with the music and the inspirational stories...and I was crying and yelling "You Can Do It!".  So here's how they came in: Danni, Joe, Pam, Francelina, Lisa, Jackson, Gina, Jeff, Mike, and Alex. The White team won!

Jillian and Sunny:

To make things fun Jillian takes Sunny rowing. They spend the day with a collegiate rowing team learning the basics and then get out there on the water with them. Sunny did great and had fun.  And then it was time to talk to her mom.  She told her that she wasn't saying that she didn't want to become a doctor, only that she doesn't know what she wants to do yet. Her mom just wants her to be happy. This was a long overdue conversation.

Bob and Biingo:

Since Biingo is injured and loves baseball, Bob surprises him and takes him to the minor league stadium where he lives. One of the pitchers comes out to play with them. He had a torn shoulder and told Biingo about recovering from an injury. Bob wanted to show Biingo that being active can be fun. And it turns out that the kid can pitch...and hit!

Back at the Ranch:

It's time for Last Chance workout. The White team tells Jillian that they hit all of their numbers for the week. Jillian tells them that they will join the Blue team again for Last Chance Workout.  Bob was a little worried about having left the Blue team alone for a week. They need a leader.

Product Placement:
Dolvett brings the Red team in to discuss breakfast. He makes them a greek yogurt smoothie (sorry I missed the brand). They loved it naturally.
*Most overweight people skip breakfast and that is so unhealthy*

Last Chance Workout:
Jackson wants his picture all over the wall.  Dolvett says that he didn't expect Jackson to be the leader of the team. He thought it would be Joe. This is a nice surprise for him. Joe struggles in this workout and walks out. He says his knee is bothering him.

It gets all sorts of ugly with the Blue and White teams working out together. Blue is struggling. Jeff does not get along with Jillian. He does not respond well to her barking and is sent back to go with Bob.

Weigh In:

Before they started the weigh in Allison asked how everyone did without the trainers this week.  Dolvett praised Jackson for stepping up and becoming a leader. For being Dolvett for the week. And the quote of the week is from Jackson: "I've always been a ripped bald black guy on the inside and it finally came out."

Blue Team goes first.
*Big Mike started at 396 lbs and now weighs 384 lbs for a total of 12 lbs.
*David started at 272 lbs and now weighs 263 lbs for a total of 9 lbs.
-Seriously, this guy has a fractured knee.  If he can do this well, ANYONE can!  Get off your butts people!
*Alex started at 221 lbs and now weighs 217 lbs for a total of 4 lbs.
- she is getting frustrated, but Bob assured her that it's not because of her effort
* Gina started at 215 lbs and now weighs 206 lbs for a total of 9 lbs.
-Bob says that she could very well be in the finals
*Jeff started at 348 lbs and now weighs 342 lbs for a total of 6 lbs.
The total is 40 lbs and 2.75%

The Red team is next. They need to lose more than 29 lbs.
*Joe started at 317 lbs and now weighs 310 lbs for a total of 7 lbs.
-Dolvett says that he has a positive attitude, but he needs to find his fire.
*Francelina started at 237 lbs and now weighs 231 for a total of 6 lbs.
*Lisa started at 223 lbs and now weighs 214 lbs for a total of 9 lbs.
*Jackson started at 300 lbs and now weighs 288 lbs for a total of 12 lbs.
-He said he had a horrible nightmare that he was being chased by 300.
The total is 34 lbs  and 3.16%

The White team is last. They need to lose more than 12 lbs
*Danni started at 228 lbs and now weighs 222 lbs for a total of 6 lbs.
Pam needs to lose at least 7 lbs or she will go home.
*Pam started at 210 lbs and now weighs 207 lbs for a total of 3 lbs.
The total was 9 lbs and 2.05%

:-(  I was sooooo sad.

In her parting interview she said that she can't wait to the the Damn in Damn Girl you look fine! te he love her.

Today she weighs 182 lbs and lost a total of 55 lbs. She didn't make it to Makeover week so she gave herself one. Damn Girl you look fine!

Have a Blessed Night my friends.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

I'm now on instagram: Jennie5973

Monday, January 21, 2013

I Have A Dream

I Have A Dream.

I Have A Dream that one day I will be truely happy with my body.

I Have A Dream that one day children everywhere will crave vegetables instead of sugar.

I Have A Dream that one day I will no longer have anxiety attacks at the thought of eating out at special events.

I Have A Dream that one day milk will be the most popular drink in schools.

I Have A Dream that one day I will be able to get through the full day without fantasizing about a cheeseburger and fries.

I Have A Dream that one day video games will be replaced with riding bikes and jumping rope.

I Have A Dream that one day I will be able to go through a grocery store without standing at the edge of the candy aisle gazing longingly.

I Have A Dream that one day families will skip Fast Food and enjoy healthy family meals together.

I have a dream that one day I will be able to walk into any store I want and buy clothes that look just the way they do on the mannequin.

I Have A Dream that one day all companies will offer and in-office gyms.

I Have A Dream that one day I will no longer live in fear of gaining the weight back.

I Have A Dream that one day people will realize that quick fixes are not the way to go.

I Have A Dream that one day I will lose my dang belly!

I Have A Dream that walking groups will replace the At-Home party craze.

I Have A Dream that one day I will like brussel sprouts.

I Have A Dream that one day ads will no longer be photoshopped.

I Have A Dream that one day I can conquer the shoulder machine.

I Have A Dream that one day the women/girls that young girls look up to will not be a size 0.

I Have A Dream that one day I can enjoy a meal at a nice restaurant without preoccupying myself with what I will have for dessert.

I Have A Dream that one day tv shows will feature average size actors and not joke about their weight.

I Have A Dream that one day Tony Stewart will finally call me!

I Have A Dream that one day Weight-loss shows will no longer be needed.

I Have A Dream that one day I will be able to do the hand-stand push-ups.

I Have A Dream that one day people will stop putting everyone else's needs above theirs and start taking care of themselves too.

I Have A Dream that one day I will walk in the Susan G Komen 3 Day!

I Have A Dream that one day treadmills in homes all around the world will stop being expensive clothes holders and start being used to walk on.

I Have A Dream that one day I will not panic about wearing a bikini.

I Have A Dream that one day Schools will triple the budget for health and fitness.

I Have A Dream that one day I will meet my pledge amount for Run for Autism.

I Have A Dream that one day Plus Sizes will no longer be needed.

I Have A Dream that one day I will not still feel like pregnant women are skinnier than I am.

I Have A Dream that one day I will no longer turn to food for comfort.

I Have A Dream that one day people will realize that they are worth it and can do it!

I Have A Dream that one day I will no longer have a giant knot in my shoulder.

I Have A Dream that one day Subways will outnumber McDonalds, Wendy's, and Burger king combined.

I Have A Dream that one day I will train with Bob Harper!

I Have A Dream that one day childhood obesity will no longer be a problem.

I Have A Dream that one day a trip to the Fitting Room will not be a traumatic event and may actually look forward to trying on jeans and bathing suits.

I Have A Dream that one day all restaurants will offer "Healthy Options" menus.

I Have a Dream that one day I will have the butt of my dreams.

I Have A Dream that one day I can go to the beach without craving ice cream.

I Have A Dream that one day Super Size will no longer be an option.

I Have A Dream that one day I will be able to look in the mirror and see how beautiful I am and not zero in on the fat that I still need to lose.

I Have A Dream that one day Halloween candy will be replaced with non-sugar filled treats.

I Have A Dream that one day I can walk by a restaurant without my knees weakening at the heavenly aroma drifting out.

I Have A Dream that one day people will realize that the key to living a healthy life is through proper nutrition and exercises.

I Have A Dream that one day I will no longer hide wrappers in my trash, even when no one else is around.

I Have A Dream that one day the people everywhere will lead more active lives.

I Have A Dream that one day I can talk to a cute boy without thinking that he thinks I'm fat.

I Have A Dream that one day people will stop making excuses and start making changes.

I Have A Dream that one day I will be a certified personal trainer and help others lose weight and become healthier happier people.

Have a Blessed Night my friends and may your Dreams come true.

Don't forget my Fundraising for Autism Research:

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Sunday, January 20, 2013

My Weekend: Crossfit, 2 Grandmoms, and Girl Scout Cookies

Hello Beautiful People,

I'm having a hard time. I have so many posts so little time.  I may need to post twice a day for a little bit. haha.

Tonight I'm going to recap the highs and lows of the weekend.

First off, Friday night was gym night. I like my Friday nights there. Less people. I can stay longer. And I make it HydroMassage night. Gym Buddy Lisa met me there and we hit up cardio and abs. And I talked her into a massage. YEAH!  She had traveled for work and was away for much of the week. I know she struggled a little because food choices were made for her, but I'm super proud of her for workouts while she was gone. Sometimes you don't always have control of a situation, but as long as you stay positive and make good decisions over what you can control...well then you are doing the right thing.

Saturday morning I woke up early. What a difference a week makes. Last week was such a struggle just over the idea of whether or not to go to crossfit, before I found out it was cancelled, and yesterday I was jumping out of bed ready to go. Well, I didn't exactly jump. I sort of hopped. I was running out of time and didn't get to make the breakfast that I wanted so I grabbed a protein bar and quickly ate a banana.

When I got there I noticed that there wasn't any other cars. I checked the website and there was no mention of class being cancelled.  Soon someone else pulled up, but the doors were still locked. After five minutes the father and son from the first class got there. It was a beautiful day and I was contemplating just going to a park for a walk if class was cancelled. A few minutes later someone pulled up and opened the doors. So we all walked in. It turns out that Coach Bryan was running late and his dad came to let us in and turn the heat on. So we took it upon ourselves to stretch and warm up.

The workout was on the board and after 10 minutes we decided that we would just start it. We weren't sure about one of the abbreviations so I got out my phone and we googled it for video instructions.   Then we picked out our weights, set up our stations, put on some music, and set the timer on my phone.  There were 3 adults and one kid. The kid cracks me up. He's obviously a gymnast and is constantly doing flips on the rings and walking around on his hands. BAH I am so jealous!  I want to be that flexible!  Whenever I see him doing flips I want to jump on with him.

Okay so we had 16 minutes to see how many rounds we could get through. We were working with kettlebell weights, pull ups, and sit ups. I think we were pretty even the first round.  Then the kid and I got a little ahead on the second. I did get thirsty a lot and my throat got super dry. I had to stop my pull ups a couple of times because my eyes were tearing from the dry throat (and some people wonder why I drink so much water).  Coach Bryan got there about 5 minutes in. I think he was proud of us for getting started. When I checked the phone it was about halfway so I shouted it out. Then he was able to set the larger clock so we could see the time.

The pullups sucked, but my big problem was the situps. I could do them, but I don't usually do full situps. It was hurting my lower back. I really need to keep strengthening that area. I tend to go heavy on the upper back, but the new gym has the back extension that I like so I am adding that in a couple of times a week.

So I sort of lost count of my rounds. We figured out that I finished a round or two ahead of the adults. I was pretty happy with that. I'll pay closer attention next time. Anyway, I got in some stretching before heading out.

Okay so the plan for the rest of the day was to shower, hit the Super Walmart for Subway and groceries before heading to Grandmom's to help her start to get ready for her move.  I kind of took a little longer than anticipated to get ready (kind of got sucked into Hoarders).  I called grandmom when I got on my way and offered to get her some Subway also. Of course then I realized that it wouldn't work to eat mine there first before I shopped because hers would get soggy.  So I needed to blitz through my shopping and get out of there.

Do you see what I see????? GIRL SCOUT COOKIES!  First thought: Oh HECK YEAH it's Girl Scout Cookie Time!  Second thought: DANG IT it's Girl Scout Cookie time!  I'm just recovering from Christmas. This is TOO SOON!  I was hoping they would have the offer of "Buy a box for the soldiers". That way I would be supporting the girl scouts, sending a tasty treat to the soldiers, and avoiding temptation. I told the girls I would get something on my way out (secretly hoping they would pack up by then...I have been known to hide out inside until they leave just to avoid temptation).

I had a few things on my list, but then I also had two meals that I wanted to get prepared for. I found all of the ingredients for my Crockpot Chicken Jambalaya (chicken, turkey sausage, jambalaya rice, diced tomatoes, and frozen peppers/onions). Sweet!  Then I found all of the ingredients for my breakfast for the Breakfast club (egg whites, black beans, skim milk shredded cheese, and salsa).   I was pretty excited for my haul.

My belly was crying by the time I got to Subway. Do you know what is right next to Subway?  Auntie Anne's pretzels. SO not cool!  I'm trying to make a positive healthy choice, and all I smell are butter and pretzels.  I did stay strong though and order our oven roasted chicken sub with spinach, tomatoes, cucumbers, and honey mustard. YUM! When you buy a meal you get to spin the wheel. I could have just said no. And I should have when I saw that a free pretzel was a prize. But, you know I was secretly thinking "well it would be free and you just can't say no to that"...even though you most certainly can say NO.

I won a small lemonade. Um...I just got a drink with my meal. So when I was leaving I offered it to the Girl Scouts. They were extremely happy to accept. I bought one box of the Peanut Butter Patties. GUH how I heart them. I got them because they freeze nicely and that makes it easier not to binge eat them. Of course as I write this they are on the shelf next to my bed. Still unopened, but they don't seem to be doing any self freezing.

By the time I got to Grandmom's I was STARVING! I quickly ate and felt much better. I no longer had Crazy Eyes and able to concentrate on the tasks at hand. I brought a bunch of boxes and we went upstairs to the spare bedroom to get started on the sorting. We were doing well. And then it happened. I was sorting through a box of books and found about 15 stink bugs. They were in the books, under the books, around the books. GAH!  I hate stink bugs. This set us back some time because I couldn't touch another box without fear of the same thing happening. But, it was time for my Syracuse Orange basketball game anyway. So I hit the couch.  My back was really starting to bother me. I took an aleve an we got the heating pad on it, but I was pretty much toast for the rest of the night...and it was only 4pm.  Before I left to go home though Grandmom made us a wonderful salad. Veggies, veggies, and more veggies. YEAH!

This morning I had to leave early for Church. We were starting a new discussion group a half hour before service. So I packed my bagel and peanut butter to go.  I couldn't stay after service to visit because my aunt had brought my other grandmom up for a visit with her sister. So I was going to go visit with some family that I haven't seen in years. I was a little tired so I stopped at Starbucks (SURPRISE) on my way. I got a tall vanilla spice latte. When I got there they said we would be going out to lunch in a little while. We would be meeting some more family at a diner. *The funny thing is that I will be going to that diner for the Book Club meeting next week so now I know where it is and what to expect for the menu.

So yeah, it was kind of cool when my dad's cousin, who I have not seen in a long long time, walked in and couldn't believe it was me. haha.

The menu had some healthy options, but I decided to make it my cheat day. I had been good. Basically, I saw Pork roll, egg, and cheese sandwich and my decision was made for me. Plus it comes with hash browns. No need to look any further. And O.M.G. Was it good. I'm a little impressed that my belly was able to handle it. That's a lot of grease that I'm not used to. I was worried about the bathroom affects to put it nicely, but so far nothing has happened. The same cannot be said for my face though. Within an hour a big giant pimple popped up on my cheek. BAH!

I stayed a little longer than I had planned.  I needed to get home to get some stuff started. My laundry needed to be done and my Chicken Jambalaya needed to get cookin! 

I just had it for dinner and oh man I am excited!  It was so yummy and I still have 4 bowls of it for dinners this week. Three are in the freezer and one is in the fridge for tomorrow's dinner. It is so in the rotation now. That's my second new meal of the month. So far so good with that New Year's Resolution.  It's all good!

Have a Blessed Night my friends.

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Friday, January 18, 2013

Christmas Travel Adventures - Part 3 - Choo Choo

Happy Friday Bleeps!

Okay, I know you all have been clamoring for Part 3 of my Christmas Travel Adventures to and from Florida.  I will make you wait no longer.

As fun as it was to drive down (stopping in Charlotte to see friends and FINALLY visit Savannah...if only for dinner), I was so on board with taking the Auto Train back. If you don't know what that is, let me explain because lots of people got confused "You drove down, but took the train back? where is your car???".  The Auto train is an Amtrak train with cars for both people and vehicles.  You can choose to ride in a coach car with regular seating or a sleeping car with beds. Your vehicle is boarded in a car in the back.

And now, on with our story....

On my last morning in Florida I woke up way early. My brother had to leave for work by 8 and I wanted to make sure I got some time in with him.  Also, if I was up early and ready to go well before it was time to leave that meant more Baby Time!  I'm no dummy!

Deciding what to wear was difficult. Whatever I wore I would be wearing until noon the next day. I had to sleep in it.  I was also starting the trip in Florida and ending it in Virginia where they had just had snow. The former Fat Girl would have been all over pajama bottoms and a sweatshirt. I would have worn my jeans, but they had dog slobber all over I picked a pair of sweat pants, a running shirt, and a sweat jacket. I kind of wanted to look a little nicer, but the sleeping part was key and I wasn't really planning on changing clothes in a train bathroom. I wasn't even looking forward to using it for it's intended purposes.

So our train was scheduled to leave at 4pm. We were told to try and be there by 2pm. The latest you can check in is 3pm. That is when they start hooking all of the cars together.  We were 70 miles away and planned on getting on the road at noon.  They started loading at 11:30, but that would mean giving up baby time and also we heard that the first cars on were also the last ones removed.

I made sure we ate breakfast and we had planned on stopping at a Starbucks on the way for a little caffeine jolt and a sandwich for lunch.  That was a good plan, but have you ever tried to drive through Orlando on a Thursday afternoon? DON'T DO IT!

I was flipping out to put it mildly. We hit so much traffic in a 15 mile area it was ugly. I wasn't worried about missing the train. I was worried about missing lunch. We would get dinner on the train, but we had no idea what seating times would still be available when we checked in. My blood sugar was dropping. I had to pee. You could hear my belly crying. It wasn't pretty my friends.  Finally we were 1 exit away and it was 2:15. There was a sign for Starbucks and I practically burned the rubber off of my tires pulling off of the exit. It was the best pee ever!

They were out of my paninis for lunch, but they did still have two of their regular sandwiches. So we grabbed them and then ran back to the car. We pulled up to the station at 2:40...20 minutes to spare people!  There were no lines and they took my car right away. So here's the thing, all of this time I have been stressing about trusting someone else to drive my car and load it on to the train. What if it's banging around?  What if they leave the car on and I'm out of gas when we arrive?  What if they leave a light on and my battery dies?  I'm a little nutso like that. But, I was so happy that we arrived that I didn't care. Here are the keys to my baby, have at it!

Amazingly enough, we got a 5pm dining time. I don't know how that was possible, but I was not complaining.  We even saw the menu and it didn't look half bad: chicken parm, beef tips, veggie lasagna, and some fish dish.

Just as we checked in they called boarding for our car. Sweet. This is working out nicely. When we booked our tickets we booked the lower level. We didn't really want to be carrying bags up and down stairs and honestly, I was thinking that the upper level would probably be rocking more and I might not be able to sleep well. So we walk in and in the lower level there are about 12 seats. It sort of felt like we were in time out. We were all facing the front of the car...which was just a wall. Behind us was the hallway for the bathrooms and a lounge car. It was a little weird at first. Our car was very quiet and we had to sit there for an hour before we even got started. So we ate our sandwiches. SO hungry...thank goodness our dining time was in two hours.

Among the announcements was that free fruit would be available in the lounge car upstairs. Sweet!  We passed through the lounge car on the way to the dining car. Oh and that's a fun walk. So glad we picked the lower level. I was bouncing all over the place trying to walk down the aisle. Thank goodness I lost the weight because it didn't feel like a lot of room to walk through.

When we were seated I ordered the chicken parm. It came with mashed potatoes and veggies. It was okay. It wasn't fantastic, but it wasn't horrible either.  I stuck with my water to drink. And then there was dessert. Coconut lemon hello!  It wasn't a large slice, but it was tasty.  On the way back to our seats we grabbed some apples and bananas from the lounge car.

We could plug in to charge, but there was no wifi. I had hoped to start blogging then, but that didn't happen. I could have written some and saved them for later, but I didn't get my laptop out.  Actually I was more inclined to download all of my pictures and edit them, but we were in a not so hotly ventilated car and my breathing wasn't that great. So I knitted until I ran out of yarn and then I read.

Most of the people in our car read and slept. I was not arguing. Quiet was nice. I wasn't worried about me being able to sleep because I can usually sleep anywhere, but I was having some breathing issues (I was fine upstairs in the dining car). There was lots of room and we could lean back and put our feet up. I sleep on my side and that was not easy in the chair so I would sleep for an hour then wake up. Then sleep for an hour then wake up. I probably would have done better to try and sleep sitting up. Anyway, I did get 6+ hours eventually.

Breakfast was being served between 6-8am. They would make an announcement at 7am.  I woke up at 6:30 so we decided to go up and eat before the rush. They had cereal, bagels, fruit, and juice. Do you know how hard it is to try and pour orange juice into a little shot size cup on the second level of an amtrak train?  Well I do. It ain't easy. I could barely get any in mom's glass. Hope she liked here tablespoon amount of juice. lol.

We arrived in Virginia an hour late, but that's okay. We didn't really have anything planned...except a SHOWER!  We were the 10th car called and were at my aunt's house before they even finished unnloading the rest of the cars. We visited there for a little while, but then the plan was to go to Cracker Barrel and tell all about the trip...and show pictures. Cracker Barrel was packed, as always and we had to wait a little while. I started to get punchy. I am not used to eating breakfast at 6:30am. I was super hungry.

I got my usual Eggs in a basket with turkey sausage. It's so yummy and I can't control myself with the hash brown cassarole...possibly the best thing ever made. It's always good going in, but I have cleansed my system so much from the grease that it is not always pleasant after if you get my drift. Sadly, that doens't stop me.

So let me just tell you that my shower that day was one of the greatest showers of all time!  And I could Breathe again!  YEAH! Sending a big shout out to Breathing!

After my shower I opened a couple more presents. My mom's roommate, who I adore, got me a Booty slide dvd. I am kind of a little excited to use this. haha.

I don't know what possessed me into running all of our errands that night, but we did. By the time we were done it was 9pm and we still hadn't eaten dinner. Bah!  Panera was closing and I couldn't wait for a waitress. So we stopped at Baja Fresh for a couple soft tacos. I am telling you, when I am hungry I can't make good decisions. And that's why I always try to plan ahead.

I don't remember much about Saturday except that I went to my Aunt's to watch the Syracuse Football game and finally download the pictures of the baby...awwwww.  Shout out to the Orange for their last win in the Big East.  Bring on the A.C.C!

Sunday morning I had an appointment to finally get a much needed mani/pedi. I had competed in two half marathons since my last wasn't pretty. And it pays to be loyal. The lady that we have been going to for the past 15 years switched salons. She knows me and loves me and opened the salon an hour earlier for me. It was nice and private...which was good cause I got in trouble for cutting my toe nails wrong. DOH!

Even though I got in trouble, it was a nice way to end the week. I headed home later in the day and got back to my regular routine.

I am so glad for the train ride back and would totally do it again. I would pack more water and healthy snacks though. They do have some stuff, but not a lot. And I did make sure to get up and walk around every couple of hours. It's kind of tough to sit for 17 hours. Especially since my thigh was still cramping from the drive down.  Lessons learned.

Have a Blessed Night my friends

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If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.