Monday, September 29, 2014

The road to Twenty!

Happy Monday Bleeps!

So today was a big day for me. It was my first attempt at 20 miles.

I went into it on many days rest. I got my sleep. I carb loaded. I was ready.

My original plan was to get up and go to it, but I had some things to do first so I opted for later. When I distance train I have to factor in meals. I couldn't go at 10 and then blow through lunch. So I planned on eating lunch at 11 and heading in after. And then I saw that the Tony Stewart press conference was on (and being held one small mile away from me). I couldn't leave. I had to watch. I wish I could have crawled through the tv screen and given him a big hug.

So I headed out once it was over. I had a plan going in. Just walk it and relax. Yeah that plan lasted 10 minutes. And then I took off. In my mind I started to break it down into 4 segments of 5 miles. I flew for 5 miles. I was feeling good. I can totally do 3 more of these. I cut it down to a walk for the next 5.

When I was on mile 8 I got a text from Ms. Amy asking if I had done my 20 miles yet.  She was my cheerleader for the next 12 miles. Every few miles I would get an encouraging text telling me that I was awesome and could do it. I heart her!

Side note: Ms. Amy and I are going to be in the Race for the Cure on Saturday. I am excited...and yes, I have my pink tutu out and ready!

So I finished mile 10 and I was thinking how good I felt. I started running again. I sailed across the 13 mile mark thinking I could double it no problem. And then I hit mile 15. Back to walking the rest. I was getting sore. My pace had been way better than expected and now I was feeling it.

I had thoughts earlier that I might go longer than 20 today.  Hahaha...I was a fool. With 5 to go I was hurting. I could feel a blister on my toe. My little baby toe was rubbing on the outside. I should have stopped so I wouldn't slow me down for future runs, but NO. I was on a mission. Short of death, I would be finishing this 20.

With 5 to go I also faced a hunger. This is something that is new to me. I never had a problem with my half marathons, but now when I hit the 15 mile mark I seem to feel very hungry. So I bring an extra protein bar for the occasion. I took a moment to eat my bar.

I ate, but it didn't help my toe at all...go figure. With 2 miles to go I hit my previous longest distance. My feet hurt. Moans were escaping my mouth every now and then. I was sweating. My toe felt like it was on fire. I wanted to stop. And then a song came on...I recommend to anyone who is training to put Ricky Martin's "The Cup of Life" on your playlist. He has a tendency to come on and ask "Do you really want it?" when I need it most. YES I DO!

With 1 mile to go I could feel it. OMG. I was going to hit 20! I DID IT!  I was so proud. There was moisture in my eyes...just sayin. I wanted to relish this victory, but the first thing that popped in my mind after was that I might squeak out another mile, but 6 more feels impossible. I have 2 more months to get there. And I will. Shoot, just last month 20 felt impossible and look what I did today.

I pushed my body today. I didn't give up. That's what it's all about people!

Have a Blessed Evening.

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

Instagram: Jennie5973

Sunday, September 28, 2014

A Vacation...from myself

Hello my Lovelies and Gents,

Well it's been a little while. My apologies. It wasn't planned at first, but then I just went with it. Last weekend I had the Brad Paisley concert and then I drove back to Virginia for a visit and to get more of my things. When I drove back and unloaded I was exhausted. Mentally and physically. And so I decided that this past week would become a Vacation week for me.

I took a break from Marathon training and the blog. I needed this time to decompress.

And now it's time to get back to my schedule.

Before I recap everything that has been going on, I shall reiterate how hard this "vacation" was for me. 

At first it was just based on travel. I can excuse that. Monday was my moving day. I may not have been in the gym, but my loading and unloading of the car (It was PACKED) was hardly a rest day.

So I'm not gonna lie. I'm not as young as I used to be. I didn't drink at the concert, but just the excitement was enough to drain me. That plus the 7 hour car ride the next day and then the ride back and I was toast. I think I would be better during non-training time, but that's not where we are right now.

Tuesday I was tired. I still needed to get work done before Girls on the Run started and then I had a session with a client. I had priorities. So there went day 4 of no running.

Wednesday, well Wednesday was a disaster. It was rainy. My joints were achy. It took me a couple of hours to get ready for my run. And then a couple hours later when I realized I was not focused and I needed a veg day, I put on my sweats and I called it a day.

Wednesday was supposed to be my distance day. It was to be a 13 mile day. I needed to do it. And then I realized that I had postponed it 2 days already. That meant that it would be two days closer to the next day. It was only 5 days until I was to do 20 miles. Nope, I couldn't do that. And so it was now day 5.

So now I'm feeling like crap mentally. Pardon me. FIVE days in the middle of training. How could I do this? Do I really want to finish? What is going on?

Thursday was my first day back. I got in 5 miles. O.M.G. They were difficult. I was tight. My right calf and quad were crazy tight. And so Friday I decided to do yoga only. I needed to stretch.

As much as I enjoyed my "rest" I was also losing my mind. What if I fell into old habits? What if I couldn't get back into a schedule? What if I had a set back?

The marathon is in 2 months and 1 week. I have completed 13 miles or more at least one day a week for the past couple of months. I am tired. I am very tired. I look great. I have busted through my pleateau. I am down 5 lbs since I moved back to Charlotte. HOLLA!  But, I am tired.

It is now time to buckle down and kick in extra rest days. I am getting in the miles. I am getting in the extra miles. I need the recovery days now.   I may be down to 3 rest days a week now. I can live with that.

I have so many things to tell you about this week. The concert was awesome. Girls on the Run is making me burst with joy. It's all good stuff. But alas, I am hoofing 20 miles tomorrow so I need my sleep.

Have a Blessed Evening

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Thursday, September 18, 2014

Recipe for Eating Success: Eating Healthy and Moderation

Hello my Lovelies and Gents,

I made the decision to cut my hair again today. I wanted to go shorter. I just wasn't happy. The good news is that there is a 7 day policy and I didn't get charged. YEAH! I went chin length. And I can still pull it up in pigtails when I run.

When I got there she was talking to another customer. They were talking about her eating habits. I was trying not to be a nosy body, but I was interested in what this guy had to tell her. For the most part I liked it. He was asking her why she thought certain things were bad for her. Basically, there are so many food myths out there. People are very misinformed.

I blame crash diets. When people lose fast weight because they cut something out it is deemed "bad".  Then when they stop the diet and gain the weight back it just reinforces this idea. This is why I don't like diets. They shouldn't be necessary. Eating Healthy and Moderation are the keys.

The thing that I didn't like was that this guy, who says he is a trainer with a nutrition background, says he hates to eat healthy. That's not what you want to hear.

When it was my turn I disclosed that I am a trainer also. I thought she was going to die. "This is my sign!".  We talked about food. She told me she is a picky eater. She doesn't like food. She doesn't like to eat. She also told me that she used to weight 400 lbs. So I think that's an incorrect statement. She used to love food. I think she's afraid of food. She is afraid of what it did to her.

We talked about introducing one vegetable a month and learning different ways to make it. She's hesitant, but will consider it. She knows her current habits are bad. She did disclose that she takes diet pills. She knows we both freaked out about it and she knows that they are bad. Hopefully, she will stop. She knows I will check in on her :-) She also has a fast food family. She would rather not eat some days. That is BAD. No food is Bad!  No food will not get you results.

Fuel your body!  Fueling your body gives you energy. Fueling your body keeps your metabolism going.

I told her how I took a while to like healthy foods, but once you cleanse your system it's good. And you'll be so thankful. We talked about how fatty greasy foods make you feel. We talked about moderation.

Food is something to enjoy. It's good for you. You need it. It just shouldn't be abused. It shouldn't be hated.

So the best part of the story is that the guy that came in after is also a trainer. haha. If only we were getting group discounts.
Have a Blessed Evening.

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

Instagram: Jennie5973

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Random Wednesday: Homesick, Butternut Squash Soup, and Brad Paisley

Happy Random Wednesday my Friends,

So I got my hair cut on Friday. I wasn't sure if I wanted to go short short again or keep my length and go with a shape up. I opted for the latter. Still not happy. I believe I will be going back for a short short in the next couple of days.


Hello, my name is Jennie and I have been suffering with bouts of homesickness. :-(  I was miserable and in a dark place when I moved to Charlotte the first time. Charlotte brought me back to life. Well I became so invested in the lives of my friends and family that I'm having a hard time right now. Technology should help (facebook and skype), but it only makes me miss them more.

Fighting the stress eating every day.

I am taking a run up for some more of my stuff on Saturday. Hopefully it'll be the fix that I need. 


I saw a commercial for Panera Butternut squash soup...OH I am in trouble.  Time for a bread bowl!


Today it was finally a cool day...that meant jeans and a sweatshirt. Happiness is fitting in those size 6 jeans!  HOLLA!


So I have been living by Tony Stewart's garage now for 72 sightings yet. I am the WORST Stalker ever!


Today I went to a new park for me. It was nice. It had a nice 1.1 mile loop. It was flat and it was a trail. We had a storm last night so parts were a tad muddy, but I'm happy to have found it. And I'm happy that it has a bathroom.

I wore my white sneakers...not the wisest choice, but it's okay. They survived. Just about killed the OCD in me.


Tonight was Bible Study. I noticed a Subway across the street from the church. Noted. I think that is now my Wednesday night dinner. I was STARVING when I got out tonight.


Friday night Ms. Michele and I are going to the Brad Paisley concert. That's all. Just wanted to share my happiness for that. THANK YOU MS. AMY! They were her tickets, but she's going to see Garth Brooks instead.


I am about to lose my mind with all of the Halloween Candy right now. I haven't bought any, but I am about to lobby that is shouldn't be put out too early. #NotEasy

Have a Blessed Evening

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

One week til Girls on the Run

Hello Beautiful People,

Today we got our rosters for Girls on the Run. I am so excited. There are 13 girls and it looks like just 2 of us as coaches.

I knew a while ago that I wanted to get involved in this program, but I didn't know all that it involved. It's not a running program. It's an empowering program for young girls. It helps build confidence and lets these girls know that there is nothing that they can't do. And it also happens to keep them active.

It's funny, when I was in Pennsylvania and I decided this was something I wanted to do I wondered if they had it in Charlotte. Little did I know that the Girls on the Run program originated in Charlotte. I loved hearing the story behind it. It started with a girl who liked to run. She ran a lot. She also was going through a lot and was in a bad place. On one particular bad day it was raining and she went for a run. She ran and ran and started to feel better about herself. She happened to be a teacher and thought how wonderful it would be if young girls could know that good feeling. And soon a program was developed. Y'all know I cried during this story (I left a lot out).

Everyone asks why I want to get involved. The answer: if there was a program like this when I was younger my life might have been very different.  I had my moments as a young girl, but I was not full of confidence. I didn't really believe in myself. I ate and I watched tv. Oh sure I had the sports equipment and I would play for about 3 minutes, but I never thought I was any good at anything and so I never really tried.

How wonderful it would have been to be a part of a group designed to build me up. To let me know that there is nothing I can't do. And to help me be active. It's okay not to be fast. I would have needed to know that.

I think my favorite part of the coaches training was being reminded that we will be working with young girls. They like to talk. And they like to play with hair. haha. Yep, I remember that now. 

A lot of the coaches are teachers, which I am thankful for. That should help with the curriculum and with behavior. It's good for me to be an Assistant this year to get a feel on how to handle things before next season.

Is it next Tuesday yet? I can't wait to meet these girls :-)

Have a Blessed Evening.

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

Instagram: Jennie5973

Monday, September 15, 2014

My Weekend Recap: GOTR, Caffeine, and Church

Hello my Lovelies and Gents,

Well okay then. It got a little busy for me this weekend.

Friday was a free day for me. I had lots to do and a lot on my mind. Since I didn't have any commitments I could go to the gym for as long as I needed. This is good. This is very good. My brain did NOT get that message though.

I was dressed and ready to go. I had my bag in my hand and as I walked down the stairs my calf felt a little tight. That's all it took.

I have a lot to do today. Maybe I should skip it. I could go get a leg massage. I really just don't feel like it. I could save so much time if I just shower and get everything done.

NO!  I needed to get a run in. So I put on my big girl pants and went. The result: my fasted 5 miles of the week. My legs and foot felt fine. I was good. I even knocked out more time on the bike after.

When I was in the locker room after the greatest thing happened. A few older ladies came in and were talking about their workout. They were talking about their "problem spots"...the underarm jiggle. I was smiling and then we got to talking. So I gave them some tips and exercises to do. I had to break it to them that there's isn't a magic pill for that area. They understood though.

And then I got to really talking to one lady. She is 78. She comes to the gym every day. Her philosophy is "I would rather come here for an hour a day than take more medicine." YES!  She gets it. We high fived.  And then I went to take a shower because I was sweaty nasty.

I didn't do anything to my hair. I went straight to get it cut. I needed that. I want it short, but I need to be able to pull it off of my neck. So we took an inch off to give it body, but it's still long enough to pull up. Ahhh.

Ms. Crystal and I took a run to Teavana in the afternoon. I have been salivating over the idea of the Caramel Chai. Needless to say, they didn't have it to taste, so I bought a cup of it to try. I got it cold. I might have liked it better if I had put some sugar in it. I didn't love it. Boooo. But, I didn't leave empty handed...did someone say Cococaramel Sea Salt? Oh yeah I did! Also, the Pumpkin Spice Brulee is back. HOLLA!

I also stopped by Dicks Sporting Goods for some running fuel. I was running out and needed some for my next distance day.

I had an early day Saturday so Friday was an early night.

Saturday morning was Girls on the Run Coaches training.  It started at 9am. They wanted us there at 8:15 for coffee and check in. That's good in theory, but a couple miles away roads were blocked off a race. It was hilarious. Every street I turned down we were blocked. I really wanted to just park and go running with them.

So I got there a little late, but so did almost everyone else. Luckily for me I had already completed all of the necessary paperwork so they didn't need anything from me. I plan on writing about about this tomorrow so I am going to skip through to when it was over. Just know that I CANNOT wait for next week when I meet the girls :-)

Immediately after I went to work. I had a client that we postponed until after training. It was a great session and I was starving after I left. It was late. I needed lunch. I had stuff at home, but needed bread. I didn't trust myself to stop and not go crazy. So I went to Q'Doba. I had forgotten that was an option. I wanted a grilled veggie naked burrito. It was late so I got the pick two with the baby steak quesadilla. I would like to point out that at this point I have traipsed all over Charlotte in the last two weeks in spandex. I was completely amused by this as I saw my reflection in the windows.

Okay so this is where things went wrong. I had such a late lunch that I wasn't hungry for dinner. I had a protein bar, but I wasn't hungry. So basically I was a lunatic on Sunday.

I was happy to start the day at church. I went to service and then stayed for Sunday School after. I ended up reconnecting with people from my first time in Charlotte and meeting new people...and possibly a couple clients :-)

After church I went to Starbucks to wait for Ms. Amy. I had Bible Study homework to do and I had a free drink about to expire. We were going to lunch, but I couldn't take it and got a spinach, feta, and eggwhite wrap. And then I went to a deli to meet Ms. Amy. I got a chicken pecanberry wrap. Chicken, pecans, strawberries, and blueberries on a whole wheat wrap. It was yummy.

Ms. Amy and I discussed playlists and beats so I will will do a post on my playlists this week.

Then we went over to TJMaxx to look at some workout clothes. I love doing this with friends. It was not something the Former Fat Girl ever shopped for. I ended up getting a new long sleeved running shirt. Pretty excited about it.

My consultation got cancelled so we went into the mall. By 4:30 we were starving again. I told you I was a lunatic. I was completely off with my food from the day before. So we went to Chilis. I wanted a burger something fierce. Ms. Amy got an awesome grilled chicken salad. I should have gotten that. I had ordered my burger Medium. Half of it was fine. Half of it was practically mooing. They made me a new one to go.

Time got away from me and I had to run back to the house and quickly load my car with the rest of my stuff for my move. I had an appointment at 7. So I arrived at Starbucks with a car full of my stuff. And looking nice and sweaty.

I arrived at my new place at 9 and still had to unload. My plan was just to unload and take a shower. I could unpack later. Nice plan in theory, but I had so much caffeine throughout the day that it wasn't an option. So I was up until 1 am. Not cool when today was distance day.

This weekend got away from me. It was full of lots of cool things, but planning ahead and eating right fell back in priority and I paid for it. Grrr

I won't be too mad at myself. I will do better next time. Besides, I completed 18 miles today so it's all good. Although they were rough since I didn't carb load or drink enough water yesterday...but I had a burger ready for me when I got home so....

Have a Blessed Evening

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Thursday, September 11, 2014

Some of my favorite memories from NYC

Hello Beautiful People,

Once again I can't decide what to write about tonight. I am adjusting to a new schedule. It's 9/11 and I was supposed to be in that area that day. Looking through old pictures.

 Sometimes I feel like I am Forrest Gump. There are certain parts of history that I was right there for. For 9/11 I was supposed to be there. I had spent the year before working in NYC. My office moved from Wall Street to Broadway. And then after I left they moved back to Wall Street. Mr. Brian and I were supposed to go up to see old colleagues and tour around that day. And then something weird happened. I woke up that Monday and said "let's go tomorrow". So we did.

I also had interviewed for a position with Lehman Brothers that would have me in NYC on Tuesdays and Thursdays. There were some communication issues and I never got the job offer, even though I was supposed to.

I absolutely believe in Guardian Angels and that is a very specific reason why.

I went through a lot of my older NYC pictures and so I thought I would share them with you. I still have a bunch before the digital camera age and will one day scan them and share.

I loved my year in NYC. Well technically I lived in NJ, but I worked there. I did a lot of walking that year. Especially when the office moved to Broadway. When we were on Wall Street I would spend my lunch hour walking up and down South Street Seaport while clenching my butt because someone told me that would help tone. um. And then at the end of the day I would take the ferry back to Weehawken and climb this crazy staircase to get home.

When we moved to Broadway I took the Jitney to 42nd street and walked the 15 blocks to the office. When I would get home at night I was running to start my Tae Bo tapes. Yep, that was back in the videotape time.

One of my favorite times is when we walked across the Brooklyn Bridge. It's my most favorite bridge. I would love to run it one day.

This is me in my "black" phase. When in NYC you wear Black.

This is me with Mr. Brian and our former co-worker Greg. I am so small.

After I left NYC Grandmom Joyce and I went back up to see Chicago. It's one of my favorite Musicals. I may have left NYC, but it never left me.

So it's no secret that I LOVE Taye Diggs. We even went to college together...although he went by Scott back then...I didn't know him. When Grandmom and I went to see Chicago we found out he was starring in it the next week. I bought more tickets...his understudy was in it :-(  Please note that I wore an oversized sweatshirt to a Broadway show...

I got a nice visit from my brother and we spent the day in NYC. He was just a young Army kid. I was not.

I LOVED Central Park. Now I loved sitting around in Central Park, but I did enjoy watching other people be active. What I wouldn't give to live by Central Park today.


This was years later after I had begun my journey. I just love this picture though. Cousin Kim and I went to see Legally Blonde. Only we didn't know that it was the first day of the Broadway Strike. So there I was in NYC on a beautiful Fall Day in a hot pink wig. We were very disappointed that we didn't get to see the show, but it still goes down as one of my favorite days ever.

 This was only a couple of years ago, but I never get tired of remembering this day. SHELDON!  Jim Parsons was simply fantastic in Harvey. I love Love LOVED it!

Weehawken had the best VIEW!

NYC will always hold a special place in my heart. You can't take that away from me.

Have a Blessed Evening.

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

Instagram: Jennie5973

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Random Wednesday: Girls on the Run, Caffeine, and Tony Stewart

Happy Random Wednesday Bleeps!

Okay well let me first start by asking if you have ever eat at Jimmy Johns?  I had my first experience a couple of months ago. I wasn't really impressed. I liked my sandwich, but not the bread. Being a Philly girl we know our rolls! 

Well on Monday I had a training and we ordered from Jimmy Johns. I wasn't thrilled about the idea. But, when we ordered online I saw the option of making it a multigrain roll. It ended up being bread, but I was okay with that. It was HUGE! *That's what she said!*

So now I can eat there. YEAH!


I dream of Salted Caramel Mochas every day!


I am beyond excited right now. My Girls on the Run Coach training starts this weekend. I have a nice 50 page pdf to read through, but I couldn't be more excited. Coach Henderson reporting for duty!


I am losing track of the number of people (more than 3) who tell me they have a hard time sleeping. When I ask how much caffeine they have had the response is always the same "Oh that doesn't affect me."

Um...yes it does. You may build a tolerance to it, but it still affects you. I used to be the same way. I used to drink it from the moment I got up til the moment I got in bed. I never fell right asleep. I would wake up in the middle of the night. I never connected the two because It didn't stop the yawning.

I don't drink caffeine after 2pm. And you know what? I don't have any problems falling asleep every night.


So I am moving this weekend. I took a few things over to the new digs today. I'm not super familiar with the area so I stopped in the big shopping center that is 2 miles away. Basically I will be within 2 miles of: A Super Target with a Starbucks in it (and it is SUPER...deli and bakery too), a separate Starbucks with a drive thru, Subway, Sweet Frog, and Tony Stewart. What more can I ask for?

Have a Blessed Evening

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Tuesday, September 9, 2014

Distance Day and my Walk of Shame

Hello Beautiful People,

Most days I can't wait to get to the gym. Distance days are not those days. I love when I'm done, but I don't love getting there.

Today was a difficult day for me. There's really no explanation for it. Perhaps I was still upset that no one made it to stage 3 on American Ninja Warrior last night. But, more than likely, it's because I didn't properly fuel up yesterday knowing that today was distance day. That plus the fact that my body is tired.

The marathon is less than 3 months to go. That means I have been training for it for 9 months. Seriously training since April. I've said it before and I'll say it again. I am slow. My knee limits me. That plus my short legs mean my strides are short. I take 3 steps for the average 1 step. My training time doubles other trainee times. I'm pounding the pavement for hours a day. I'm tired. I cannot wait to relax on December 7. I seriously don't plan on moving a muscle for a week or two after.

I had gotten in the habit of doing my distance later in the day because that meant I had the morning to do stuff. But, I need to start transitioning it to the morning. The race starts at 7am. I need my body conditioned for eating and drinking (and peeing) at that time. I didn't quite make it that early today, but I went in the morning.

My first 3 miles S-U-C-K-E-D. I did not want to be there. I did not want to do it today. I thought about making it just a 10 miler, but that meant I still had to have a distance later in the week. Besides, I was wearing my new sneakers and my 26.2 headband. Those are reserved for Distance Day only now. I had to do this.

The first 3 miles are always the worst. I always want to quit during them. I always want to make it a lighter day during them. Once I hit mile 4 I am fine. And today was no exception. I hustled it on mile 5 and hit another problem. I was inside on the treadmill, but I was having breathing problems. I left my inhaler at home. I don't always need it so I sometimes forget it. So I slowed things down.

Around mile 7 I was still thinking that I wanted to cut it short a little. I knew I was going to get hungry. All I could think of was that Wendy's is in the same parking lot and they have baked potatoes. I wanted one so bad it hurt.

At mile 9 I got off the treadmill and got my protein bar. I heard my belly roar and I knew I wouldn't make it 4 more miles. The irony is that today was bagel day at the gym. I had never been there for that. I had already eaten breakfast and I considered taking half a bagel. I should have done that.  The bar satisfied me for a little while. But, then I had to use the ladies room. I finished 11 miles. That was good enough.

No, go back and give me TWO more!...and I'll get you a dang baked potato.

And so I did.

That is another story. I was miserable sitting in Wendy's. Fast food depresses me. The food depresses me. The atmosphere depresses me. I felt like I was doing the walk of shame when I left. I inhaled that potato and it's what I needed, but I doubt I will be doing it again. The funny thing is that while I was in line a lady came in behind me. We had been talking in the locker room. Definitely not cool that we met up there. 

I was miserable for a couple of hours. I just wanted to leave. But, when I hit mile 13 I was as happy as can be. I pushed through it. It wasn't that taxing physically as it was mentally today. I have a lot on my mind and I'm very distracted. It didn't matter though. I am on a mission.  It is September 9 and I have logged 49 foot miles so far this month. My goal is 175. I'm already behind. ACK!

Marathon training is not for everyone, but activity is. Even if you don't feel like it, it's necessary. It'll make you feel better in the long run. There are many things in life we don't want to do, but we have to do them anyway. Once your body is used to activity it will crave it. You can make it fun. But, there will be days when you really don't want to do anything. Do it anyway.

I have never regretted working out, but I have regretted not working out.

Have a Blessed Night

(please note the swollen left knee...and this is before I started)

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

Instagram: Jennie5973

Monday, September 8, 2014

Why do I feel the need to justify Rest Days? I have earned them!

Happy Monday Bleeps!

Today was supposed to be a distance day for me. Although, I didn't  exactly rest yesterday. I was still planning on it. And then last night I felt extremely tired while watching football. My throat started to feel scratchy. My adrenaline was wearing off. This morning I woke up and my throat was super uber scratchy.

I had an appointment this morning. I was still planning on a decent run in the afternoon. The appointment ran long. I should have a call this evening and I had some work to do. I made the call to make it a rest day. My throat hasn't felt bad since this morning so I am hoping my rest was all I needed.

A scratchy throat for me is usually my body's indication that if I don't slow down I am about to get sick. Rest is a good thing. I push my body every day. It's important for me to listen to it. And it's important for me to know the difference between my body talking to me and the Former Fat Girl trying to get her way. There is a BIG distinction.

Sometimes I have a hard time distinguishing between the two. I should have rested more when my foot problem started. It wouldn't have lasted as long as it did. I get scared. I get scared that it's not my body talking and it's the Former Fat Girl trying to get in my head. I know better though. I know when it's my body. It's just hard to give in to it.

I wanted a run tonight bad. But, we are 3 months away. I can't risk losing a week or two to being sick.

The hard part is that I feel like I have to justify this to myself. I shouldn't have to do that. But, that's the history I have. I always justified my life of "rest days". I justified why I wasn't doing anything. I could rationalize anything. There was no excuse that was too lame for me.

It's too late.

I just ate.

I haven't eaten yet.

I didn't get enough sleep.

I just did yoga last month.

My knee hurts.

I have my period.

I wore purple today.

It's raining.

I am too stressed.

I can't concentrate.

Sex and the City is about to come on.

I walked around the mall yesterday. That was plenty.

I just bought these jeans and they fit perfectly. Why risk it?

There was no excuse that I couldn't come up with. But, today I am in great shape. I work hard. I am allowed bonus rest days. I shouldn't have to justify it. As long as I don't let them happen day after day I win. The Former Fat Girl is going to lose this battle.

Have a Blessed Evening

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Sunday, September 7, 2014

Embracing the New Me

Hello My Lovelies and Gents,

It's been a nice couple of days this weekend.

Yesterday Ms. Crystal and I went to the park for a hike/walk. I had gone there once before and really enjoyed it. I have been thinking about it a lot when I knew I was moving back. This park is huge with several hiking trails, several running trails, lots of fields, playgrounds, pavilions, and several lakes.  It is glorious.

I packed my water...lots of it. I also switched out of my white sneakers. Hiking trails plus white sneakers do not go well together.

The day was beautiful. It was a little cooler than the past few days so we got moving.  We decided to hike towards an old house. It's not there any more, but the ruins are. So we consulted a map. They were out of paper maps, but luck was on my side as some guys drove up while we were there and gave us theirs. Yay.

It was a nice walk. There was some mud, but that's not really a problem. When we got to the house we had logged a mile. It was a little hard for me. I had to remember that it wasn't my normal pace. We weren't on a flat open course. We still made good time though.

When we walked back we decided to take another trail back. That way was a little further with a lot of hills. It was starting to get warmer, but since we were under the trees it wasn't too bad.

After 3 miles we came back to the car. Time for more water. I wanted to take a look at the lake so I took a walk around it. I found the most glorious view. I had to head back around a second time to get more pictures.

They look like pictures you would find on a puzzle. Just stunning. All I could think of was the many Saturdays that the Former Fat Girl spent watching television or sleeping. She missed this the first time around.  Well not this time!  I am going to do this all of the time!

This morning I had a client consultation so I went to the early service at my old church. I had been debating about what to do about that. I have been praying a lot. I loved that church, but I have grown to love other formats. Well I spent the whole time crying this morning. I felt like I had come home. It was a good feeling.

I had gone to my car after to grab my running skirt to change in to. When I came back in I saw a sign up table for the CROP walk. It's a walk to raise money to end Hunger. I signed up immediately. And then I did some thinking.

When I was here before I wanted to sign up, but never did. I can't really think of why I didn't other than I thought that I couldn't do it. It's a 6K. I could do that in my sleep. I was beginning my journey when I lived in Charlotte the first time. I was seeing changes, but I still didn't quite believe in myself. I still thought I would fail.  It makes me sad, but there is no looking back, only forward.

You may remember from my posts about Empty Bowls how I feel about raising money to end hunger. It hurts me to think about all of the extra food I have consumed and wasted over the years. People go to bed hungry every night and I abused food and my body for years. I am ashamed of that. So I will do what I can to help those who appreciate a good meal.

If you would like to help please see my fundraising page:

This week has been a good one for me. There have been struggles, but for the most part I am embracing the new me in my favorite city :-)

Have a Blessed Night

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

Instagram: Jennie5973

Friday, September 5, 2014

Today was a good day: Training, Tony Stewart, and Rest Day...ahhh

Hello Bleeps (short for Blog Peeps)!

Well today was a Rest day. I was up at 4am to shadow a Personal Training Client at 5. Then I came home for a mini nap before I headed out for another shadow. And then I had a surprise visit. I met my dad and a bunch of his friends at the Nascar Hall of Fame. They came down from Greensboro for a couple of hours. I think you all know I was like a pig in slop. It was so much fun. Very interactive. And LOTS of Tony Stewart.  I was happy.

Let me paint a scene though. I was parked waiting for Dad and his friends to get there. The Parking lot was packed. All of a sudden a big white van pulls in next to me. A guy in the front seat looks like Duck Dynasty crossed with Santa. He waved. I waved back. When he got out of the van he said "I have someone in the back who is looking for you."  Now this could go one of two ways. Either it's my dad or this is a VERY creepy situation because I know Tony Stewart is in Richmond. Good news: It was my dad :-)

So I was on my feet all day. I was up for hours. And as of 5pm I had only hit 5000 steps. That's a little aggravating, but I know what it takes to get to  10,000. People tell me all of the time that they are on their feet all day, but that doesn't necessarily mean they are moving. Sure you burn more calories standing than sitting, but it's not raising your heart rate. That's what's needed. 30 minutes a day!

I started reading a book about working with young runners today. There have been some interesting studies. First, I love the one that found that when an inner city school started a Marathon training program the students that participated had a 90% graduation rate compared to the 67% of the rest of the school.  That was pretty awesome. The second was that the kids that added 30 minutes of running 3 days a week to their schedule of just Phys Ed classes had less body fat after 12 weeks as opposed to the kids that didn't.

30 minutes people!  It makes a difference.

Okay, so back to my day. I had a really good time at the Hall of Fame and when it was time to leave my belly realized what had happened. Clearly all of the Nascar stimulation kept me from realizing I was off schedule and starving!

I made my way towards Subway. By the time I was eating it was 2pm. OMG. I have been up since 4 am and all I had all day was a protein bar, a banana, and 60 oz of water. No lunch. No Caffeine. Um...WHAT? Bad Jennie!  BAD BAD Jennie!

I had planned on going for a run in the afternoon if my legs felt okay. I can't believe that it was my first big legs day in forever yesterday and I didn't feel a thing today. I am in crazy wicked good shape y'all! The real test will be tomorrow. I have a trail run planned. Let's see what happens.

I could have gone, but since I hadn't fueled properly I decided to make it a Rest day. Besides, I had some reading and program writing to do. Plus, today was the day that I got my confirmation for the school I will be working with for Girls on the Run. I had some more paperwork to do. SO excited!  I have my first coach training next Saturday.

Today was a really good day.  All of that happened PLUS I talked with one of my favorite people, she knows who she is, and she told me the most wonderful things. My heart soars when I hear how inspiring and motivating I am to people. Sure I would like the money (and if someone will offer me some I will gladly take it), but that is the real reason why I do this. If I only ever reach one person then it will all be worth it.

Now if you'll excuse me, the caffeine that I had at 2pm ain't working and I am ready to call it a night.

Have a Blessed Evening

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Thursday, September 4, 2014

Anxiety - What if made the wrong decision?

Hello my Lovelies and Gents,

Well let me first say that today was legs day. So if I get a little cray cray please forgive me. I haven't had a good legs day in a long time.

The first time I moved to Charlotte I was in a very bad place. I was in a horrible living situation. I hadn't really been spending time with my family. It was easy to leave.  It was going to be a fresh start for me. And it was.  

So many times people would say that I was brave to make that move on my own or that they could never do that. It's easy when you are in a dark place.  Charlotte was my light.

This time was different. There were things that made me miserable, but this time I immersed myself in my family. So that made it a little harder to leave this time. A lot harder to leave. What if this life that I have been dreaming of for years was just a dream. What if I made a mistake? I have wanted this for so long, that maybe I didn't give myself other options for happiness.

This past week has been a little unsettling. I am still getting things started and I have to remember that. A friendship that has been strained for a little while hasn't gotten any better. It hurts. It has made me think that maybe I am not where I am supposed to be. Getting the client base started takes time. I am training and it's moving. But, money becomes a factor. The living situation becomes a factor.

The other night I ran to the store to pick up something to eat. I wanted chocolate. I was in the car heading home before I realized that I never picked up any. I stopped again yesterday for a couple of things and I didn't get anything then either. Now in all fairness I had a Salted Caramel Mocha at Starbucks. I got a tall and I nursed it for 3 hours.   I didn't even get a cake pop or anything.

The urge to eat something sweet when I am stressed doesn't seem to go away. I would like to say that I used some tricks to deal with it, but I don't know why I was successful this time. I think it's because I was starting to feel a little better that I really did make the right decision.  

For the last year and a half I loved the churches I went to, but stayed on the sidelines. I didn't get involved because I was "leaving soon". I have been here for one week and I was invited to join a 9 week Bible Study. It started last night. I was so very happy. I am still not sure about what church I will be joining, but I know that whichever I do, I will jump in to get involved. That makes me smile.

I have also found a place to live. I was stressing. I didn't want to live with a stranger and I don't like being alone. Luckily a friend's daughter just moved out. And get this...she lives less than a mile from the Stewart-Haas Garage...that's Tony Stewart's garage. I am in heaven. I promise not to stalk him!

Have a Blessed Night

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

Instagram: Jennie5973

Wednesday, September 3, 2014

Happy Random Wednesday Y'All!

Happy Random Wednesday Y'All!

So I am back in Charlotte near where I lived before. The new gym I am going to is very close (used to be a grocery store). In fact it's in the same shopping center as the Wendy's that I used to go to. The Wendy's that I would run to when I was hungry. I would hit the Dollar menu like a dollar equaled low calories. Many a Frosty was consumed because of that Wendy's.

This may be a challenge.


Before I left Virginia I went to Modell's, a sporting good store, and found something I wasn't even looking for. I think we all know how much I value my sneakers. I heart my Reebok. They work for me. But, I have always wanted to try the Asics Gel. The problem is the price. I am not willing to spend that much money on them.

Well this was my lucky day. I found one pair in my size. They were normally $149.99. But, they were on clearance (I believe someone returned them) for $69.99. Seriously?  So I snatched them up. With all of my foot problems recently.I was a little excited about this.

I wore them for a couple of days just to break them in. I loved them. So even if they didn't work for my running, I would happily wear them all day.

The good news is that I ran in them for 15 miles yesterday. I think we have found my Marathon Sneakers!  I am going to reserve them for Distance days. I heart them!


Pumpkin Spice is back!  I have had a couple of Iced Chai Tea Lattes with Pumpkin Spice. They are so yummy!  Some have had more pumps then others...just sayin that one was practically neon orange!

Also back is Salted Caramel Mocha! HELLO!!!!


I have been doing some software training for the new gig. My first morning doing so was a nightmare. I had so many computer problems. I got a virus. So basically for 24 hours I was crying thinking I needed a new computer. It is not in the budget. I spent a lot of time with Norton cleaning it up. There are still some issues and I will need a new computer eventually, but right now it's manageable. That was VERY stressful though. My belly hurt and I wanted to eat a LOT.


I am working on getting on a new schedule. I need routine so this is good. Routine is good for me. YEAH!!!!

I am a little emotional and overwhelmed right now so routine helps a lot. It calms me down.


Last week I got an awesome surprise. Aunt Kathy sent me a Alex and Ani bracelet."It's Not a Sprint, It's a Marathon". I LOVE it! I have the best family and support system!


Today was weights day in the new gym. I had previously only been on the treadmill. I would like to paint a picture for you. Little petite blonde me hitting all of the machines with all of the large muscular African American men. LOL. They loved me!  I think I'm going to like it here.


This weekend Tony Stewart was back in his race car. This is one happy chick!


Time to Update your Playlist:

Here's the full list, according to votes placed at Run Hundred--the web's most popular workout music blog.
Calvin Harris - Summer (Twoloud Remix) - 128 BPM
Nicki Minaj - Anaconda - 130 BPM
Röyksopp& Robyn - Do It Again (Zoo Station Radio Edit) - 125 BPM
Nero - Satisfy - 124 BPM
Meghan Trainor - All About That Bass - 134 BPM
Neon Hitch - Yard Sale (Radio Edit) - 128 BPM
Maroon 5 - Maps - 120 BPM
Pharrell Williams - Come Get It Bae - 120 BPM
Jessie J, Ariana Grande & Nicki Minaj - Bang Bang - 149 BPM
Cash Cash & Bebe Rexha - Take Me Home (Chainsmokers Remix Radio Edit) - 129 BPM
To find more workout songs, folks can check out the free database at Visitors can browse the song selections there by genre, tempo, and era—to find the music that best fits with their particular workout routine.
Have a Blessed Evening

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Using not-so "rest" days to my advantage

Hello Beautiful People,

So here's the thing. It's been a little crazy hectic lately. So busy that I haven't gotten in all of my training days. It's been a good and a bad thing.

Some days involved helping out in classrooms. Some days involved packing and unpacking my car. Some days I was just nursing injuries.

My packing days may not have been in the gym, but they were workouts. I want a shout out for how much I lifted. Girl got strength!  Now strength is only effective if you lift properly. I was trying to be all cool and carry something with one arm. I knew it was stupid. It killed my shoulder. I was actually a little nervous that I tore a muscle. I was in a lot of pain the next day on moving day. A heating pad and aleve helped. It feels much better, but it didn't feel good for a little while.

There was a lot of stress with the move. I am excited and full of anxiety. It doesn't help that I was missing my runs. That is a good stress reliever. And then I get more stress when I don't workout. It's harder to get started back up again the more I "rest". That's when it gets in my head. The Former Fat Girl gets a little excited. She remembers these days.

Yesterday I had planned on a run. That was the plan. But, my work training moved from 8am to 11am. That pushed back my lunch time. And as we discussed yesterday, lunch time is very important!  I ran to meet Ms. Amy for some food. Then we went to the mall to walk around. I wanted to get a massage. We walked around for hours and stopped for a Margarita. According to fitbit I logged 4 miles doing that. I was actually a little impressed with that.

The day that I moved, I logged 5 miles. That was literally just taking things to and from my car. And they weren't light. I lifted a lot and I got my cardio. Of  course I went from loading from the first floor to unloading on the second floor. I like to end it all on the steps. Spoiler: My knee was ANGRY with me after.

I decided to use all of this "Rest" to my advantage. Today was a distance day. Let's see how I do on fresh legs. I planned on 13 miles. I didn't want to overdo it. PS. I love that 13 is not overdoing it. haha. I felt great approaching 13. I decided to keep going for 2 more. And I felt great approaching 15. But, I was now well past lunch time. 15 it would be. I was good with that. I celebrated with a massage. This Planet Fitness does not have the water pressure massages, but they do have the chairs. I forgot that they are still good. Not AS good, but good.

I still hate having so many busy "rest" days. I don't like what it does to my brain. I don't like that they make me feel lazy. But, I have to remind myself that I am in great shape now. I can afford several in a row.  And I will just use them to my advantage. I shall Distance after.

The Former Fat Girl would have been SPENT after each of these "rest" days. Well not anymore!

Have a Blessed Night

Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter: hugsnsmile

Instagram: Jennie5973

Monday, September 1, 2014

My feeding Schedule...I'm worse than a baby

Hello My Lovelies and Gents,

Okay so I'm going to combine a couple of trips.

I am very much into routines and planning ahead.  This is especially true with my meals. I am like a baby. I eat at the same time every day. It's important for me. I plan around my meals. If I end up eating too late then I am hungrier and I tend to snack and make some not so healthy choices.

I also get VERY cranky like a baby if I am off schedule. I'm not going to lie. My friends and family know this.  I am known for stopping the conversation and saying "I am hungry NOW. Let's go!"  It's not a pretty picture.

I love when I spending time with Ms. Carol and the girls. I LOVE it. But, even with two young girls we are on totally different feeding schedules. I am like the animals at the zoo.  You know when it's getting close to my feeding time. I am pacing around the kitchen.

Since the girls meals revolve around their activities and naps it's a little different than mine. I don't nap that often, but when I do I like it to revolve around my eating.

My first day with the girls I ate breakfast before I drove over. We went straight to the beach. Luckily they were staying Oceanfront so it was a short walk. Ms. Carol packed snacks. We were going to spend the morning playing in the ocean. Then we would come back around lunch time for food and a nap.

I loved every moment on the beach. I didn't want it to end. Miss Olivia and I were playing in the water. She is fearless. She wanted to play all day. I would lift her when the wave came in and put her down in the water. Now as anyone who has ever played with a child knows, she could do this FOREVER. Again!  Again!

We did this for hours. Aunt Jennie needed a break. So we sat and had our snacks. Miss Olivia wanted to go back in the water. Aunt Jennie wanted lunch. Snacks were good, but not enough.  I could spend all day every day with those munchkins on the beach....if I had lunch.

Lunch was had a little later than I usually eat. It's okay. It was followed up with a nap. Miss Olivia wanted me to nap with her. I would at least lay there til she fell asleep. I fell asleep first. I think I was asleep for an hour and a half. Poor Ms. Carol. That was our visiting time. My girl was so wiped out though she slept another hour and a half.

We were waiting for Mr. Jared to get home from golf before we made dinner plans. The original thought was to go to out. We had promised the girls we could go to the pool after naptime. So we finally went to the pool at 5. Between the pool and then showers it was a little late for dinner. So we decided to place an order and pick it up. By now I'm starving. I don't make good choices when I am starving. I just ordered a sandwich, nothing fancy, but I did inhale a couple mozzarella sticks because I couldn't take it.

The next day we were trying to get rid of all of the food so they wouldn't need to take it home. That was fun. lots of chips, dips, and salsa....and wine.  I had planned an afternoon run, but I was was not fueled properly so that wasn't going to happen. Plus it was so stinkin humid.


Okay so now we are on to the trip to see nephew. We packed some snacks, peanut butter, and good stuff. The deal was that my brother and sister-in-law had just moved to Pittsburgh from Florida. The Army packed and moved them. We would take care of nephew while everything was unloaded and unpacked.

On our way there we stopped at a rest stop and they had the most amazing Fresh Market. Peaches the size of oranges. Zucchini the size of baseball bats. Apples that were golden and delicious. We stocked up.

So when things got packed the boxes weren't exactly labeled properly. In our five days there the kitchen shaped up, but they still hadn't found the dishes (they were not in any of the boxes marked dishes). There was very little counter space available. So we ate out a lot.

Their new house is in fast food heaven. I could literally see the McDonald's across the street while sitting in the living room. There was also a Burger King (that I could smell at 11pm while laying in bed with the windows open), a Taco Bell, a Little Caesar, an Arby's, and a Dairy Queen. Luckily there was also a Subway and Panera. We hit them a few times.

Our first morning there I ran to Panera for bagels for everyone. When I got there I saw the most amazing breakfast sandwich: egg whites, avocado, spinach, on a not so bagel. I loved it!

Every time we took nephew to the wonderful park, and I do mean WONDERFUL, it always seemed to be close to meal time. That meant he got an hour of fun before Aunt Jennie got hungry and had to chase him down to get in the car.

One night I was starving and literally could not make a decision about dinner. Wendy's was proposed. I was not thrilled, but everyone wanted baked potatoes. Okay fine. So I got the orders and went. I changed my mind a hundred times while I was in line. I ended up getting half of the asian chicken salad and a small fries. And then I realized that I ordered a half because I was going to get a baked potato too. So I threw in a small order of chicken nuggets because I thought I would be starving. Now had I been in my right mind, I would have just stopped at subway on my way home and been fine.  I really really really wanted to get a burger, but I didn't. 

Another night we took nephew to Applebees. That was funny. It was Friday night so it was a little crowded and nephew was happy and vocal. I ordered that Chicken Freshcado.

Fire-grilled chicken breast gets a topping of avocado relish and is served with white rice. We’ve loaded this dish with avocado, pineapple, peppers, onions, sliced zucchini, cucumbers and more. 440 CALORIES

OH MY. It was yummy...

Now in all fairness, I also ate most of the spinach and artichoke dip...and half of a burger. I told you I get HUNGRY when I am off my schedule. 

This was a challenging week for me. We thought about picking up an oven roasted chicken and veggies, but we didn't have the kitchen available to make anything. All things considered I did well though. And I lost a pound!

Have a Blessed Evening

****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.