Sunday, February 26, 2012

I feel like I can't stop eating...what's going on?

Happy Daytona 500 Day Bleeps!

Bah...rain delays make me so sad.  And mad.  Sad and Mad!  I had planned on going to the gym after the race today.  We are now 2 hours after the delay of the start of the race.  I am neither at the gym nor resisting temptation. In a case of "Oh I don't buy this at home so I should indulge myself here" moment, I made myself a reuben for lunch. I did not use butter and grill it, but I still had it.  And a cookie...but not just any cookie...a berger cookie.  One of those cake cookies with chocolate frosting.

That cookie has been haunting me since I got down to my dad's yesterday.  So let's go back to yesterday.  I got up early and went to the gym for weights with gym buddy Mike.  I told him up front that I was out of gas and wasn't sure how much I had in me.  I also knew that I had a long day ahead of me.  This might sound like an excuse, but I'm in tune with my body.  I know exhaustion vs. just a little tired.  My body is exhausted.

We put in our cardio for a warm up and headed over for more back weights.  I told him that my arms hurt for 6 days so we are cutting back on the amount of weights until I'm more comfortable.  So we did.  It was still tough, but just knocking them down by 10-20 weights was enough to make me happy. After we worked our abs I took 10 minutes on the mat to just stretch my muscles...ahhh.

After the gym I ran home to shower and pack up.  My dad wanted me to stop and pick up some hoagies for him on my way.  I of course said yes and then had a moment of terror hit me.  My car is going to smell like an italian hoagie for 3 hours.  How the heck am I going to survive this drive?  I quickly made a plan.  First, I would put them in a sealable bag in the trunk.   Second, I would stop at Subway for a sandwich before I pick them up.

The plans were good in theory.  I got my subway and was happy.  Sadly, the sealable bag I brought was not big enough.  And there was a long wait when I got inside to pick them up.  All I could smell was lunch meat, sweet peppers, cheese, oregano...Even though I had just eaten, my mouth was watering.

I made it down without stopping to eat them.  Go me!  But, I did stop for a potty break at Dunkin Donuts and got a mint hot chocolate.  I know, it's close to Starbucks, but I didn't give up hot chocolate and it was cold and windy yesterday.  Perfect hot chocolate weather.

As soon as I got to Dad's he busted open one of the ginormous hoagies and we all had some. was about an inch thick of lunch meat...HEAVEN!  I kept my portion small, but dear lord that was good.

Shortly after we were invited over to some friends for dinner.  BBQ.  Um yes please!  So I had salad, a bbq sandwhich (on whole wheat rolls as Ms. Cheryl would like to point out) and a random side of thai drunken noodles (but it had veggies in it so I counted it as half-acceptable...sorry, but my morning workout got me HUNGRY).

The Syracuse game was on at 9pm. It was not looking good.  If I was tired when I started the gym in the morning and I did not have any Starbucks, how in the heck was I going to stay awake for the game?  So I tried to take a small siesta, but I didn't get very far.  And then Ms. Cheryl made me very happy.  They had peanut butter oreos....Um....HEAVEN!  I had two.   Then it was time to go home for the game.

I watched for 15 minutes before I started to pass out.  I was so stinking tired.  I started to come back to life every once in a while.  It wasn't the game that got me, it was the thought of those berger cookies in the kitchen.  I am not going to lie.  I would love to say that it was my sheer willpower that kept me from eating them, but the reality is that I could not get up if you paid me.  I finally woke up with 4 minutes left in the game.  Gah...another ab crunching game...they won, but it was too close.

So here I sit waiting for the race to start and I feel like I'm losing my mind.  I have not eaten so this much in forever.  What the heck?  Is it because I'm not keeping myself busy?  Is it because I am out of my routing? Is it because I didn't workout?  Is it because I'm not eating enough for my workouts and my body is trying to catch up?  Is it habit from watching tv?  I don't know.  All I know is that my dad offered and made some buffalo chicken meatballs (with a blue cheese filling) and I had 8. 

Come on Mother me out!  Clear up the rain so I can focus please!  Luckily, I took tomorrow morning off with a Weather contingent full day off.  HaHa.  I have the morning off, but if the race is rained out I am taking the whole day so that I can watch it.  I am THAT dedicated to Tony Stewart...CALL ME!

 ****Please note****

If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you!  Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week.  The journey is so much easier if you have support.


  1. Ironically I just wrote about how I have this insatiable hunger lately and I cannot get full. I had a CRAP eating week last week... so annoying. And can I just say, Buffalo Chicken Meatballs with blue cheese filling sounds AMAZING to me. That would be worth every darn calorie in it :)