Less than 48 hours to go!
Today was a beautiful day. It was a cold day, but beautiful. I struggled with what to do at lunch. I really wanted to walk, but I also really wanted to relax. As much as I love walking and working out, you have to know that I still have to talk myself into it every day. I can come up with a hundred reasons not to. It's easy. But, I know I will be very unhappy with myself if I don't do it.
Today was different. The Sun was calling my name. I wanted to so bad. I actually had to talk myself out of it. Why you ask? That's just plain madness Jennifer. Here's the deal. Last night at church everyone was sick. I was so paranoid that I would catch something. Between that and the cold I didn't want to take a chance of getting sick when I'm this close to the race. I wanted to walk, but I wanted to stay healthy more. So I stayed in and read.
I compromised. Since I was not walking I doubled up on the weights and abs tonight so that I wouldn't feel so bad. GO ME! I want a flat belly sooooo dang bad. One day I will have one. I promise! I'm hoping that the stress and anxiety from this race will go away Saturday afternoon and I will drop 5lbs on the spot from relaxing. haha. I know it won't happen, but a girl can dream.
Okay, so I have to confess...today was a bit much. Since I had yesterday off and I have the next two work days off I had a lot to do at work. It was a crazy day. I can't believe I'm about to say this, but I didn't have any water until I got home tonight. *GASP* It was cold this morning so instead of taking my usually bottle of water, I filled a travel mug with Chai tea. Then for lunch I bought a diet pepsi. I don't remember the last time I bought a soda at work.
So did I just let stress get to me? Or am I self sabotaging? I really hope that I wasn't doing that. I will let you in on a little secret. I keep having this horrible vision. I see everyone waiting at the starting line and all of these people are looking at me saying "What are you doing here? You don't belong here." I do believe it's that Former Fat Girl leading the charge and trying to get me to fail. I don't have these visions often. Mostly I am seeing me cross the finish line, but they still pop up.
Alright kids, I've got to get to bed soon. I am planning on getting up with my usual alarm in the morning. I'm anticipating having a hard time falling asleep tomorrow night so I don't want to have slept in and encouraged it. I need to make my packing list and read a little. Sweet dreams.
PS-Someone tell Tony Stewart that I should be crossing the Finish Line between 10:15-10:45am :-)
If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.