Hello my Lovelies and Gents,
Alright kids, let's talk about me. haha. Let's get down and dirty. Not that way! Get your mind out of the gutter. My grandmother reads this for goodness sake.
I have a love hate relationship with Boot Camp. I love it for shaking up my workouts. I love it for making me step outside of my comfort zone. I hate it for making me step out of my comfort zone. I hate it for highlighting what I know I need to work on.
Most of the people who go to class and participate in the Health & Fitness challenge know that I am studying to become a personal trainer. It stresses me out when we do something that I struggle with. In general, class is after a big workout for me. It should be my day of rest. So I have been staying with the modifications for beginners. And even then there are things that I struggle with.
The whole time all I am thinking is that everyone is looking at me thinking there is no way I can be a trainer. This is something I struggle with constantly. Especially if I am having a "fat" day. Personal trainers are their very own marketing tool. If I'm not in shape, who is going to listen to me?
I am solid. I am muscular. In my head I know that I have come so far and that I do look great. But, most days I can't see past the flaws. I know what I still need to work on.
I have endurance. I am strong. I am somewhat flexible. I cannot balance. I am not agile.
The things that I am not good at in class involve balance and agility. I struggle. Now granted, I have tried these same exercises inside on a flat surface and I perform much better, but still not great.
There are times in class that I feel like a big giant spotlight is on me. "And now we're going to do something that is so easy for everyone except Jennie." I know it's not true, but that is the Former Fat Girl surfacing. "They are all looking at you. Come on, you can't do this. Let's just get up and leave and go to Wendy's."
So here's the thing, I have a strong core. As soon as we turn to core work I'm all over it. Straight leg work, I'm all over it. Push ups? Give me more! There is so much in class that I can do. And I can do it better than most of the people in class. But, all I seem to focus on is what I can't do.
I have known that I need to work on my balance and agility. It's not a newsflash for me. But, it's making face it. It's time. If I were my own trainer I would be incorporating this into my workouts. So it's time to put on my big girl pants and step out of my comfort zone.
I miss yoga class. That helped with my balance. I seem to go in cycles. I haven't had yoga in a while so it's time to bring it back. I will work on my balance. And then I will add agility exercises to the program. Who knows, if I do well, maybe next year I could be coordinating boot camp :-)
Have a Blessed Night.
I signed up with Run for Autism again :-)
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