My daily reminder to BREATHE

Hello Beautiful People,

I can BREATHE again! The 2022 Charlotte CROP Hunger Walk was on Sunday and I can. finally, relax. Well for a little while. 

So last we met I was lamenting about being on TV. On Friday, after the last of the kids left preschool, I rushed to eat my lunch, brush my teeth, fix my hair, fix my makeup, find something to set my laptop on for the proper height and logged in to my zoom. The interview lasted 7 minutes. I didn't think it went that bad except that the lighting kept getting darker and lighter. She said it was fine so I went about my day. 

Saturday was a big day. It was technically a day off for me, but I was glued to the TV to watch the Phillies (baseball) game. If they won then they were going to the National League Championship Series (the winner goes to the World Series). It was stressful. Luckily I had a project to work on. I got giant picture mats to use as a photo op at the walk. Unfortunately, they were solid so I had to measure them and use a box cutter to make frames. Plus I needed to decorate them. I ended up sitting on my floor working on this project for 3 hours. I didn't think anything of it until I woke up the next morning with a SUPER UBER-tight calf. GAH! I know better. In my defense, it was an INCREDIBLE game, and the Phillies WON!



I should probably mention that my Anxiety level last week was DEFCON 1. It's been 5 years since my dad passed away, but this is the first year that the Phillies have been in the postseason since he passed. Baseball was our first mutual love. I have wanted to call him during and after every game. I have been wearing his Phillies shirts and his jersey on game days. I cried at the end of every game because I can't call him. So that's been fun. 

This is my first year as the Co-Chair of the Charlotte CROP Hunger Walk. It has been the top CROP Hunger Walk in the country for many years. We were number 2 a couple of years ago, but we got the title back last year. Well, we knew going into this year that there were several factors that were going to affect the total amount that was raised. We were probably going to take a big hit and it was beyond our control. That didn't stop us from setting our goals high though. Last year we set a goal of $180,000 and we raised $220,000. So we set a goal of $200,000 this year. Realistically we hoped for $150,000. My church always sets a goal of $10,000  and in the 9 years that I have been involved, we only missed that goal once and it was only by a small amount. Now, remember that I am the co-chair of the whole walk and not just a team captain. Just 9 days ago my church had only raised $1900. I was privately freaking out. And then not so privately. I know that my fuse was short and I was getting snappy with people.  I really was starting to feel like a failure. I was spending hours a day trying to get people to sign up or donate. If my church couldn't even come close to the normal amount, how bad would the full total be? I mean we are always in the top 5 fundraisers for the Charlotte Walk. 

I had my talk with myself and I knew that I couldn't have done any more. If we didn't meet our goals it would not be for lack of trying on my part. I had to be okay with that. The week leading up to the Walk got progressively better. The numbers started to creep up and I could get back to my baseball anxiety. Oh did I mention that I was also having a particularly awful period? UGH. Honestly, I can't wait till they are over. 

Alright, so Sunday morning arrives and the first thing that I notice is that my right calf is TIGHT! WTH? I limp around and get ready and run out the door before the news comes on. I don't want to see it.  

I get to church. I need to see a couple of people and I want to recognize my walkers before I run to the stadium. I felt like I was living in double time. I was talking fast. Time was zooming by. I was on a high from the win and then my eyes would tear up thinking about my dad. In a word, I was a MESS. 

I got to the stadium and the first thing that I noticed was that I was HOT. I had been monitoring the weather all week and I knew it would be 80 during the walk, but we still had a few hours to go and my legs were on fire. It was hot already. 

We got everything set up and I sat down to eat. We had ordered lunch. And I'll call them out. Last year we ordered boxed lunches from Panera. We tried again this year, but they hung up on us several times. NOT COOL PANERA. It was a pretty big order too. We ended up ordering from McAlister's Deli. I love McAlister's so that was good. I have never had their veggie sandwich before. OMG! It was soooo good. 

Spinach, tomato, cucumber, red onion, house-roasted multicolored peppers, avocado, herb mayo, salt and pepper on 9-grain.

In the meantime, I noticed that no one had messaged me that they had seen me on the news. OH Well. Hey, what's happening across the street? UM, another walk!  WTH? A Heart Walk that was scheduled for the weekend of the hurricane had apparently been rescheduled for our walk day. Oh, and they were literally walking on the streets directly around the stadium where we were during the time when our second group of volunteers and walkers should be arriving. BREATHE JENNIE!



It worked out. We had a good size group of people arrive and start walking. I was the emcee and I started the walk by mentioning that we had a tent with water and snacks, but I don't think people were paying attention. No one was going to the tent. So I brought the tent to them. I put water bottles in a box and I stood in the middle of the walkway and I passed out water. As I write this it is Tuesday night and 46 degrees. There were no clouds on Sunday and the high was 85 (but it easily felt like 90). Many of the walkers dressed for the weather from the morning. I was NOT about to have anyone pass out on me. We had a DJ so I danced and handed out water for 3 hours.  I even walked up the steps to take water to people resting in the stands. 

My favorite part of the day was when I checked the total raised online and the overall walk had raised $99,500. I mentioned out loud how great it would be if we could raise $500 more before I went back onto the field in 45 minutes and could announce that we had raised $100,000. A couple from my church offered to verbally commit to $500 that they would donate when they got home. I started to cry. We might not make our goal of $200,000. But to raise $100,000 is something to be proud of. I can't wait to give you the update when we get all of the cash/checks deposited. 

I enjoyed the walk even though I only got to do 1 lap around the field. Don't worry though. I came home with 14,000 steps. I was moving and only sat down to eat. I should have walked though because I danced so much that I literally could not move when I got home. I walked right to the shower. I was out. I mean the Eagles (football) were hosting the Cowboys on Sunday Night Football and I didn't have the ability to focus. I still watched them win, but I didn't have the energy to cheer. I was using the massager on my hips and my left quad. I was using it for so long that it turned off on me. 

Before the walk started I got a text from the reporter asking for pictures that they could use on the 6 o'clock news. I did record the 6 o'clock news to see the pictures I sent and then I wanted to die because that was when my interview aired. I DID NOT WANT TO SEE IT! I told you, I don't like to see myself on camera. I didn't use "Um", but I use "So" just as much when I speak as I do when I write. The lighting must've been a factor. I know what I said and I know what was edited out. UGH. I knew two people who saw it and they said it was good, but I think they were just trying to be nice. 

If you are interested in donating to the CROP Walk, here is my page: 

https://events.crophungerwalk.org/2022/jennie-henderson-2

Well, it's the 8th inning and the Phillies are up 2-0 against the Padres. I'm going to call it a night and concentrate on the game.  I'm heading to the beach for the weekend so I'm not sure when I'll be able to get to my next post. I'll try for next week.

 I appreciate you. 

Have a Blessed Evening,


Jennie
xoxo


****Please note****


If you feel like you are alone on your journey and you just need some encouragement I am here for you! Shoot me an email and I will do my best to check in on you or give you the words of support you need several times a week. The journey is so much easier if you have support.

jhendersonfit@gmail.com 
Check out my Facebook Page for Confessions (there are before and work-in-progress pictures):

http://www.
facebook.com/ConfessionsOfAFormerFatGir

yeah, sorry, I messed up and the "l" is missing....I need an assistant :-)

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